Will He Really Leave Her for Me?: Understanding Your Situation, Making Decisions for Your Happiness

by Rona Subotnik

You've found the man for you--and you know you belong together. But he belongs to somebody else. He says he doesn't love her anymore . . . but he's still with her. Your friends and family tell you to... This description may be from another edition of this product.

• Format: Paperback
• Language: English
• ISBN: 1593374852
• ISBN13: 9781593374853
• Release Date: October 2005
• Publisher: Adams Media Corporation
• Length: 239 Pages
• Weight: 0.72 lbs.
• Dimensions: 0.7" x 5.6" x 8.5"

Customer Reviews

A must read for the "other woman"

I wish I had read this book about 1 year ago, but maybe it wasn't the right time. I have been in a relationship (affair) for almost 2 years. It has been heart wrenching, emotional, and a test of who I am. This book really helps you to analyze who you are, why you are in this situation. And helps you to be honest about where it might be going. It is NOT a chick-lit, Lifetime kind of book. It is written by someone who has seen both sides and is not judging you for why you're here, rather trying to really help you to examine things and be strong to become happier. Anyone is this situation knows how abnormal the relationship is, despite the feelings you may have for this person. PLEASE read it if you're here, and you will be better off for doing so, no matter what comes of everything.

A dose of reality

Ms. Subotnik really brings reality to the table in this book. Without judging "the other woman", she brings up points that we may have put out of our minds in pursuit of "The One", who happens to be married to someone else. What if we waste years yearning, and even believing his promises that he'll leave her when this or that happens, only to find ourselves older and unable to have children, or having wasted years of our time waiting for something that never happens? Is it worth it? She constantly brings up those important aspects of reality we'd rather ignore, and asks us "is it worth it?". This book is a great wake-up call for those of us in relationships that will probably never go beyond affairs with married men. The odds are heavily against us that he'll never leave his wife for us. Ms. Subotnik makes this very clear. 5 stars all the way.

First rate help for a painful situation

This book is a must for women who are having affairs. In a very readable and respectful way, Rona Subotnik helps women to understand why women make these choices to have affairs. This book does not condone affairs in any way. This book explores the magnitude of such choices and the outcomes of affairs. She is helping all women, both the wives and the other women in this wonderfully written book. It is very important for women to understand their behavior, its impact on all concerned, and to face their issues and to work toward a happy and healthy future. Five big stars and cheers for Rona Subotnik! This book is a must!

So Much Judgmentalism.....

As an avid collector of relationship books aimed at women, I think this one is excellent for its ability to treat women who find themselves in affairs with married men with sensitivity, dignity and respect. It is obvious that popular opinion is against these women, but I find it strange that none of the reviewers here has pointed the finger at the married men, who I think should bear at least half if not more of the responsibility in such situations. Women in affairs often find themselves seduced into them by circumstance, lack of perceived opportunity or lack of self esteem. I say it's high time someone treated these women like human beings instead of lining up to stone them. I think that bashing this book and the women who get involved in affairs is to blame the victims in most cases. Then again, society has been casting the first stone at such women for eons without looking in the mirror or asking who is really responsible for these situations, so this is nothing new, unfortunately. These women need help sorting out a difficult and heart-wrenching situation that often brings them more unhappiness than happiness in the long run, and hats off to Rona Rubotnik for doing it so well. She understands that an affair can be the result of many complicated factors and that "blame" is not the issue. The correct response is to help people find their way towards happiness, whatever that means for them. The truth is that most women want a full time man who can give them a real relationship, and this book can help them realize that, and that they are most likely barking up the wrong tree if they continue in their affair. Then again, they may not be, and that is the question they seek to resolve by reading this book. And I think it certainly gives them the right questions to ask and points them in the direction of a real self-analysis that can bring them to the resolution they so sorely need. Affairs have been going on since the existence of marriage, and despite ethical and religious convictions many highly prominent and otherwise decent married men (and women) still engage in them. Why aren't the negative reviewers here bashing them instead of the single women who get involved with them? It's about time someone wrote a book to help the women who end up in these relationships figure out what's best for them. Most women want what is right and this book can help them find it. So I don't agree with the reviewers who bash this book. I would also say that any married man who did leave his wife and married the 'other woman' was not happy in the first place and likely realized that the relationship with his wife was over anyway. Again, hats off to Rona Subotnik!

Must-reading for women involved with married men!

As the author of books for women whose husbands have affairs, I was very interested to read a book directed at the "other woman." In a non-judgmental and empathetic way, Rona Subotnik describes the challenges for such women, the price they pay for involvement with a married man, the potential outcomes of the relationship, and how to look at things from the perspective of their lover and his wife. The author injects realism into the fantasy of secret romance. This book is very well written, and will be very helpful to those whom Subotnik has termed "ladies-in-waiting," women who in fact spend years waiting for the happiness that they believe they will find if the man actually leaves his wife for them.