My wife is a magician; yesterday she turned our car into a tree. A big white horse walks into a pub. The barman says, "we have a drink named after you." The horse says, "What? Eric?" I said, "Waiter, what's that in my soup?" he said, "I'd better call the boss, I can't tell one insect from another." I'm reading a book called "Sex Before 20." Personally I don't like audiences. I said, "It's...
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