Toddler Adoption: The Weaver's Craft

by Mary Hopkins-Best

Book Overview

Toddler Adoption looks at the unique joys and challenges of adopting and parenting a toddler. When a child aged is adopted between the ages of 12 to 36 months, they often show signs of cognitive and... This description may be from another edition of this product.

• Format: Paperback
• Language: English
• ISBN: 0944934218
• ISBN13: 9780944934210
• Release Date: January 1998
• Publisher: Perspectives Press (IN)
• Length: 272 Pages
• Weight: 1.15 lbs.
• Dimensions: 0.7" x 6.0" x 9.0"

Customer Reviews

Excellent Resource

I read this book after having returned from Kazakhstan with our 11 month old son. While I agree with a couple of the other reviewers that it could be a bit depressing at times, I also found it to be a very valuable tool in helping me assess some of my son's behaviors and recognize what might be adoption related versus typical toddler behavior. There were many valuable suggestions for those with toddlers who are dealing with emotional trauma. This book is not for the faint of heart, but those who have the courage to read it pre-adoption and use it to help evaluate their prospective child might find it is the best resource they have access to.

I'm Glad I found this book

Being able to watch for attachment and bonding issues really helped all of us become a family. The information on adopting a toddler, the agency gave us was miniscule in comparison to what is avaliable in this book .We knew we might end up with a Toddler eventho our child was assigned to us when she was 9 months old. She was 23 months old when we got her home! I think the author prepares you for the worst that could happen in toddler adoption. I hope she comes out with a 2nd edition including more happy stories. Our daughter transitioned better than my highest expectations. My expectations were lowered after reading Toddler Adoption. All in all that was a good thing. I sometimes wonder if being prepared changed our handling of situations, thus allowing us to facillitate her transition and bonding. Because of the information in this book, We choose to travel to pick up our daughter and, we were better prepared for the "rejection phase". This book was useful in stopping overbearing well wishers from becoming annoying. I actually handed this book to my neighbor open to the section on bonding, while she was being intrusive the first week our daughter was home. It was a back up to my words of "no you may not feed her". It also helped both sets of grandparents prepare for the inital visit with the newest addtion to the family. Read the book, but don't think "This will happen to me". Rather think these things could happen but I can shorten the amount of time they take.

A very valuable resource for parents of adopted toddlers

This book is a practical, upbeat guide for parents who have adopted a child who is old enough to carry with them the weight of past experiences and the loss of former attachments (or the hurt of lack of attachments) yet are not old enough to express their emotions or memories in a way that can help their new parents help them. Hopkins-Best has helped unravel some of the mysteries that come with toddlers with a "past". I found her approach extremely helpful with our Romanian son adopted recently at the age of 34 months. I learned that some of the eating problems were actually rooted in attachment problems and that I had been handling the outbursts at the table in exactly the wrong way. Within days of changing my reaction his behavior improved dramatically. I wish I had read the book before I adopted a toddler, but I'm glad I read it soon after or we may have had a much longer struggle with attachment. I would consider this "required reading" for anybody looking to adopted a child over the age of one year.

All Around Perfect Guide

Hopkins-Best has penned a must-read book for anyone considering adopting a child older than an infant. My interest lies in adopting children who are school aged, but I still found many relevant bits of advice in this book. Discussing the feelings of everyone involved one gets the feeling that Hopkins-Best has truly "done her homework" and indeed, being the mother of a little boy adopted from Brazil as a toddler, she has.

This is a MUST for all parents considering toddler adoption!

The book is a very compassionate look at both toddlers in need of stable, permanent homes and the parents who adopt these wonderful kids. It tackles all aspects of both the problems these families face, as well as the joys, in a down-to-earth, easy to understand way. I read the book in 3 days, and loved it enough to read it again. I know that as my son grows and flourishes, I will owe part of his success, as well as a part of mine as a parent, to this book.