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Paperback The Sweet by and by Book

ISBN: 0061579513

ISBN13: 9780061579516

The Sweet by and by

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Book Overview

Meet five North Carolina women who are about to change the way you think about friendship. For Rhonda, a gritty, fun-loving hairdresser in tight jeans, the sights and smells of Ridgecrest Nursing Center are depressing. But before she can change her mind about working there, two residents glue themselves to her: Margaret, droll and whip-smart, with a will of iron that never fails her even when her body does, and Bernice, an avid country music fan...

Customer Reviews

3 ratings

Age and Sickness find a home in this novel, humorously

Since Todd Johnson, author of this debut novel, has worked with Oprah Winfrey, and since this book screams "Oprah's Book Club," don't be surprised if he gets her endorsement (which is worth a lot --- just ask Barack). This novel, with its emphasis on ordinary lives, dignity, friendship and the power of women, is classic Oprah. It also deals with the "only two unforgivable sins" in America, which are, as smart doctor-in-training April says, "sickness and aging." Wisecracking and iron-willed Margaret Clayton and childlike Bernice Stokes, who seems to have a bit of dementia, would agree. Bernice, who never gets a viewpoint chapter to herself, is portrayed through the eyes of Margaret, April's mother and the nurse for Bernice and Margaret, as well as hairdresser Rhonda. Rhonda, as a younger person, first hates the idea of doing hair for the residents of the nursing home where Margaret and Bernice live. However, Rhonda pays attention to the older women, as does Lorraine, and soon develops an unshakable bond with them, especially with Bernice. The other characters in the book treat Bernice as a crazy oddity because she likes to carry around a ratty dirty stuffed monkey. Some forms of mental illness or eccentricity aren't tolerated in our society, as Johnson skillfully portrays. Not having Bernice speak for herself (except through old letters) is at times frustrating, but no one does mental illness and death as well as William Faulkner. In any case, although Lorraine has unwavering faith and heart of gold, April provides the youthful perspective, Margaret is a sharp-tongued survivor, and Rhonda reveals her wounded heart and her hopes for redemption, Bernice steals every scene she's in. "Attention must be paid," Linda Loman says in "Death of a Salesman," and Johnson makes the point, most specifically through Lorraine and Rhonda, that we're at our most beautiful when giving the forgotten and invisible people of society as well as the ones who need to be awakened to the beauty of their dreams. As Lorraine notes, "I don't care who you are, Sick and Old are comin to see you whether you invite em or not." However, aging and sickness manage to be funny and poignant in this novel without succumbing to maudlin three-hanky prose. The novel takes a while to unfold, deliberately slow as a lazy afternoon, but this is not a fast ride, it's a character study. It's strictly chick lit (despite a male author and a few sympathetic male characters), so it's note for every reading taste, but it's worth the read.

Touching, thought-provoking story--life-changing.

I was initially drawn to this story because we placed my mother-in-law in a nursing home a few months ago after almost 20 years of living with us. I got MUCH more out of it than just a good story--more on that in a minute. I really liked the style Todd Johnson used--first-person narrative of four main characters. He was able to show such different viewpoints of the same circumstances, e.g. life in a nursing home. The books spans quite a passage of time, but it's done so in a way that you don't miss all the details in-between; you simply adjust to the point in time where the story is being told and the changes that have occurred. He quietly conveys the slow decline of Margaret, the aging of Lorraine, the maturing of April, the personal growth of Rhonda--as well as the impact Bernice has on all of them. I appreciated how you could get a clear image of Ada by putting together each of the four characters' impressions of her! I learned to love these women as they showed compassion, patience, and kindness to those they befriended and waited on. ".....But as Mama always says, 'I don't care who you are, Sick and Old are comin to see you whether you invite em or not." On the deeper level, Todd Johnson is able to bring such a sensitive perspective of the journey we all will go on as we travel down the road of life--dependency on our parents..... independence.....dependency on our children and caregivers. We ALL want to be treated with dignity and kindness; if we live long enough, we will all change roles from caregiver to the person needing care; and as that happens, it is as frustrating for the receiver of that assistance as it can be for the giver (no ones wants to depend on someone else to do everything for them). As I visit Mom almost daily, this book has made me acutely aware that she may be thinking about so much more than she shares--her past, present, and future all parade through her thoughts in her many waking hours as well as her dreams. This book helped me to be more sensitive to her needs and those around her, caregivers as well as other residents. Truly loved the book, and as another reviewer stated, kept forgetting a man wrote it because he so vividly captured the essence of these women. A great read!!!!

moving, funny, true--- an outstanding first novel that sees into the heart

I stayed up nearly all night reading this novel-- I cared so much about the characters that I really wanted to know what would happen next in their lives. When a snowstorm closed the office yesterday I read all day. At the end of the book I cried the best kind of reader's tears. This is a moving, very funny, and very wise book. As one of the main characters says, "Life is choosing whom and what you love"-- this book explores that idea through the interconnected lives of five women. The story unfolds as a series of vignettes, each told in the "first person" voice of one of the main characters. All of these women are imperfect human beings, flawed and endearing in their own ways. Two live in a nursing home, trying to cope with the corresponding loneliness, loss of freedom, somewhat grim surroundings, and the inevitability of becoming sicker, weaker, and less in control of their own lives. The other three main characters are younger women who interact with the elderly characters. In this somewhat unlikely setting, the author unfolds a book about love through the end of life. Elderly Margaret Clayton is much loved by her daughter Ann who visits nearly every day, but essentially she faces life with the support of the nurse who cares for her. Margaret feels very much like a real person to the reader, full of spirit and biting humor as she copes with all of the challenges and indignities of aging in a typical institution. The stark realities of aging and the discouragement she experiences are counterbalanced by her kind heart and capacity to love. We come to understand Margaret as a person who is still growing and facing new challenges through the final years of her life, even as her body and mind deteriorate. Margaret's friend in the nursing home is Bernice Stokes. Bernice does not have the same resources for coping as Margaret-- her loving son has died, and the remaining son and his wife appear to have little love or compassion for her. Bernice has a fragile, childlike mental state--- she has retreated into a life that is largely fantasy, including an extreme attachment to stuffed toys. Yet she has a devilish sense of fun-- Margaret relies upon her not only for physical support but also for the emotional energy and inspiration to face each day (and occasionally break the rules/feel just a little bit more in control of her own life). Bernice relies heavily upon Margaret's understanding and kindness, when few others understand or care for her. Lorraine is the licensed practical nurse who takes care of Margaret and Bernice. Over the course of their many years together Lorraine and Margaret develop a deep and intimate friendship. Lorraine's story unfolds through stories of her faith, friends and family, and through her thoughts as she tries to care for her patients at the nursing home. In describing the relationship between Lorraine and Margaret the author has written a profoundly successful description of real love and compassion be
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