The Flawless Skin of Ugly People

by Doug Crandell

Do people have to be beautiful to be loved? Hobbie--this novel's darkly romantic hero--has been banished to homely man exile in the North Georgia Mountains, where his enemies are mirrors and bears. Things are not going well for Hobbie. His skin is a pizza face, super-sized, with extra pepperoni and pitted olives. Job status? Former bank teller. Love life? His common-law wife Kari has gone AWOL at a weight-loss clinic in North Carolina. But just as...

• Format: Paperback
• Language: English
• ISBN: 0753512998
• ISBN13: 9780753512999
• Release Date: January 2007
• Publisher: Virgin Books
• Length: 211 Pages
• Weight: 0.44 lbs.
• Dimensions: 0.5" x 5.4" x 8.2"

Customer Reviews

Soon to be a Major Motion Picture

Denver's Rocky Mountain News declared Doug Crandell the new J.D. Salinger. Sir Richard Branson saw the talent in this brilliant writer and signed him as Virgin Publishing's inaugural author. What do these folks know that you don't? That Doug Crandell's writing is unpredictable, and that he writes out-loud what our inner voice speaks in whispers. And while our voice is muted by shame or decorum, Crandell's characters push through the polite public veneer with funny and touching regularity. The Flawless Skin of Ugly People follows Crandell's two wonderful memoirs of his youth in Indiana, and one wonders if this isn't just the culmination of a Heartland trilogy. For me, a kid who grew up fat with acne, the writing and dialogue is authentic, hopeful, and never contrived. Anyone with an ounce of compassion in their souls will recognize Crandell's as the voice (some are lucky enough to hear) saying "hey, it's gonna be alright, you'll see." This is another brilliant offering from Doug Crandell. I can't wait for the next one!

To Hell with the Devil

Any novelist (first-time or otherwise) who has the shells to (straight faced) evoke Ratt's "Round And Round" for poignancy, and then, just for good measure (and without irony, mind you,) drag in the yellow-and-black-attack of God-Metalists, Stryper, is fine by me. Because, you see, not only do I have that Ratt LP on vinyl, I have the first issue of "To Hell With the Devil" with the controversial artwork featuring a winged and hyper-muscular Michael Sweet et al giving Lucifer a guitar enema. But I digress. The Flawless Skin of Ugly People also features one of the most cringe-inducing (and I was raised on Stephen King,) and painfully prolonged scenes of self-mutilation I've ever experienced. Equally disturbing is the scene of a child's sexual molestation - only this time it is the brevity and, damn it, the banality that gets under the skin and stays with you. (Crandell pulls off a feat only the most accomplished of novelists manage - I found myself incorporating the protagonist's experiences into my own subconscious. Hence the high shudder factor.) Sure, it'll make a great movie, but bring on the soundtrack!

Definitely going to be a movie someday

I totally agree with the reviewer's title who said it reads like a movie in your mind. I know a book is good when that's how it reads for me. And then when the movie does come out 5 years later, those characters are still so envisioned in my head that no matter how good the actor is at becoming them, I'm still a little disappointed. This is what happened to me with Everything is Illuminated, The Hours, A Home at the End of the World etc. all of which were great movies but even better books. So I don't know who will play Hobbie or Kari or Roth or what tiny piece I'll be so mad that they edit out, but I'm sure I'll still feel a little sad that they aren't what I've already come to know.

Crandell's great new novel . . .

Crandell's book, the Flawless Skin of Ugly people reflects the wounds of human judgment and the stunning restoration of love. Hobbie is not unlike a family member we all know who makes up the background of our lives: quiet, hidden, and uncomfortably there at holidays. Not forgotten, just never remembered. But Hobbie no longer lives in anonymity with his obese girlfriend of 20 years. Kari left to change her life and has now gone missing. Hobbie becomes our guide on a quest to find Kari. We ride along following Hobbie's roadmap where quirky characters provide the landmarks for life's turns. Hobbie's common-law family and hangers-on reveal what lies beneath the surface: character and honesty. Crandell's story is a convex mirror of his characters' lives. Past events begin fainter at the edges then come into broad view, dead-center. Crandell reflects the hurt as well as the fortitude of Hobbie, Terry, Kari, Roth, Sally, and yes, even Donny. The details of Hobbie's painful excoriations of his face were difficult to read. Not only is Crandell unrelenting in the gory details, but we want to help Hobbie purge the hurting beneath his skin. At least I did. Crandell shows that we all have ways of hiding what hurts us. I don't think anyone can read this book and not find a feature of themselves somewhere inside. I loved this book and think you will too.

Reads Like a Movie in Your Mind

Crandell writes so well that some will miss the profound importance of this important work of fiction exposing the reality of our societal constructs of beauty. While dermatologists will rave about how Crandell has been the one to write so beautifully about what they have been trying to communicate to patients and the unconcious public, this book gives us a Beauty and The Beast story like nothing before it. Or does it really? I don't think so. You see the title is for us for our own story, because I just can't find an ugly person in The Flawless Skin of Ugly People, but when I finished the book, it seems like they were all around. Ah, but so were so many more beautiful people that I had been missing all along. Thank you Doug Crandell for Hobbie and the new prescription, I see so many more beautiful people now. Please continue to write books that people can't put down.