The Emotional Incest Syndrome: What to Do When a Parent's Love Rules Your Life

by Patricia Love and Jo Robinson

Book Overview

From Dr. Patricia Love, a ground-breaking work that identifies, explores and treats the harmful effects that emotionally and psychologically invasive parents have on their children, and provides a program for overcoming the chronic problems that can result.

• Format: Paperback
• Language: English
• ISBN: 055335275X
• ISBN13: 9780553352757
• Release Date: February 1991
• Publisher: Bantam
• Length: 304 Pages
• Weight: 0.66 lbs.
• Dimensions: 0.7" x 5.1" x 8.1"

Customer Reviews

Emotional and REAL!

This book is an important addition to the collection of books out there that exist on sexual abuse. Even moreso are the examples of how a mother can be sexually abusive in covert ways unlike fathers who tend to manifest their abuse overtly. This book along with Ken Adam's book, Silently Seduced, are the bible of Covert Incest. It is easy to say covert incest does not exist since it is subtle, indirect and is about what you don't see, but the victims of this all feel it and it is very real!

Insightful, groundbreaking

I looked for years for a description and diagnosis of my abuse symptoms, and, after years and years of therapy, found this book to be the link between my existing abuse symptoms and my past. The best part of the book is it's forgiving approach. Heal yourself, don't condemn. Know that no parent is perfect, understand the source of the problem, understand what behavior needs to change & practical tips on how to do it. A fine, insightful -- and I think -- groundbreaking book, though there seem to be others with similar theses.

A Very Important Book

In this comprehensive book about emotional incest, Pat Love goes into great depth about the causes of emotional incest and its devastating consequences. The author explains how emotional incest can take on many forms, depending on whether the parent is neglectful, critical, or sexual. She also provides helpful exercises throughout the book to help emotional incest survivors come to terms with the abuse. Highly recommended.

Wow! What a great explanation of disturbing behaviors!

It can be extremely emotionally validating to realize some things you experienced as a child were unhealthy, especially if they get in the way of happy, productive relationships later in life. This book is about recognizing unhealthy, enmeshed relationships and learning how to move toward something more healthy. It teaches you how to do the work necessary to make things better for yourself. You won't change the parent who put you in an emotionally incestuous situation so don't waste your energy on an effort that's guaranteed to fail. Instead focus on learning new ways to respond to the unhealthy behaviors of your parents. This will enable you to recognize and change your own unhealthy behaviors, which is especially important if you are a parent who wants to end the cycle of emotionally-damaging parent/child relationships.This book helps to identify, understand, and overcome many prior experiences that have been holding you back. It describes perfectly the relationship my husband had with his mother, his inability to pull away for so long, and the reaction of his family when he finally tried to gain a healthy distance from her. Recognizing this behavior and learning to deal with it was an emotional life saver for me. If I could give this book 10 stars, I would!

Read this if you have an enmeshed parent-child relationship!

I have read many. many self-help books...but this is the only one that focuses specifically on this complex and often overwhelming problem. The author exactingly describes "incest" scenarios and the possilble background of your parents that makes them the way they are. I'm now in my 40s, and still struggling with the issues the author discusses...this book has been a tremendous resource. It's comforting to know I'm not alone...now if only we could all form our own support group!