You've seen the rest, now meet the best: The Daddy, the ultimate in bad Dad joke books And no wonder with jokes like these:
I've started work as a waiter. Granted, the money's not fantastic; but at least I can put food on the table...
My fear of horse chestnut trees. After years of therapy, I've finally managed to conker it.
I took my PC back to the shop when it wouldn't stop swearing at me. I said, I think it might be the curser...
So I said, doctor, doctor, every time I go for a number two, it comes out looking like chips. He said, have you tried pulling that string vest up a bit?
I asked this bloke what his American Pit Bull puppies were going for. He said, anything they can get their teeth into...
Delivery driver walks into the medical centre and slams a dozen pizzas on the counter. He says, before anyone asks, it's just what the doctor ordered.
This bloke emptied a packet of grated cheese over my head. I said, that was mature, wasn't it...?
I rang the gaffer. I said, I'm just arriving on the south coast now, boss. He said, do you realise it's five in the morning? And what are you doing on the south coast? I said, just what you said, boss: making sure I was in Brighton early.
I said, I can't believe how much weight I've put on. I might have one of those over active, erm, erm...She said, thyroid gland? I said, no, knife and fork
My pet mouse, Elvis...he was caught in a trap.
The Daddy comes with its own dedication page, enabling you to pen an extra special message for that extra special person in your life - your Dad Go on, I dare you: treat the old man to a copy, then skedaddle to a dark room somewhere while he works his magic, teasing and tormenting as only a Dad can. As it says on the guarantee, he'll love it - you'll hate it