Statements: True Tales of Life, Love, and Credit Card Bills

by Amy Borkosky and Amy Borkowsky

Book Overview

She was too busy to keep a diary. Luckily, AmEx kept one for her. From comedian Amy Borkowsky comes a hilarious collection about how she-quite literally-spent her early years as a single career woman. After digging out several dust-covered boxes from the back of her closet, Amy discovered twelve years' worth of credit card statements, documenting, in their own way, every significant event in her life. They show that on July 12, 1993, Amy spent $189.12...

• Format: Hardcover
• Language: English
• ISBN: 1596090871
• ISBN13: 9781596090873
• Release Date: July 2005
• Publisher: Chamberlain Brothers
• Length: 194 Pages
• Weight: 0.72 lbs.
• Dimensions: 0.8" x 6.3" x 8.9"
• Age Range: 14 years and up
• Grade Range: Grade 8

Customer Reviews

Funny, with substance

Got it to give as a gift but cheated and read it first. Started out just skimming but it really pulled me in. Laughed out loud and thought parts of it were heartfelt, too. Some the the observations reminded me of Carrie from Sex and the City in a good way, though the author clearly has her own style. I'm married now so enjoyed remembering the craziness of being single. Amazing how you really can track your life through credit card bils. A top-notch, really funny read overall.

She Got a Lot out of her Amex Statement

It seems like Amy Borkowsky has found a new art form. Instead of having to go to all the work of keeping a journal, writing things down, forgetting where you put the damn thing. And so on, you just find the things around you that are keeping records and use that as the basis for a book. What she does here is use the records on her American Express statement to jog her memory into what was behind that expense. She does a lot better at this than I do, I look at the statement and wonder 'what the hell did I buy from WalMart for $39.76. Just one example is her reflections on the Starbuck bills. Her doctor tells her that too much caffine can aggravate a migraine, and especially a kind migraine that feels like you're being stabbed in the head with an icepick. Reporting to her mother. 'What if, God forbid, you're walking alone at night and someone stabs you in the back of the head with an icepick? How would you know? When you should be yelling: Help Police, you'll be calmly asking passersby, Excuse me, do you have a Tylenol? And what if the attacker is also a pervert?' 'Don't worry, I'll just tell him, Not tonight, I have a headache.'

Thoroughly Enjoyable

This is a very entertaining book and, in many instances you don't really need to know exactly what was charged to enjoy the story. The items charged are merely a way to lead in to something the author remembered, a fun adventure from her real life recalled when she examined her old Amex bills. The book is not arranged chronologically, and since each story or funny essay can be read independently, it's great if you want to read a few pages at a time without losing any flow. I liked that even though it's about all the items and meals and other things she purchased, she doesn't come across as a shopaholic type. I'm not into Manolo shoes, and I could relate since she shops at places like Macy's (though a few other purchases seemed a little splurgey). But as I already mentioned, the shopping is a small part. It's about a young single woman trying to find love and trying to find herself. If this sounds like you, you will thoroughly enjoy this book.

Brilliant concept -- book lives up to it

This whole idea of this book is what caught my attention, and I was pleased to see it did not disappoint. I appreciated the humor, all very well done, and I'm sure women will relate to the whole single-woman perspective. As a guy, I appreciate that the author manages to cover dating ground others have walked on in a fresh way and without crossing the line into man-bashing. In fact, in several stories, she seems very sympathetic to guys, but still manages to have enough edge to get you laughing or, in some cases, just thinking to yourself, "Hey, I never thought of it that way." She has a couple of references to why women shouldn't buy guys expensive gifts, and I naturally take exception to that (LOL). As someone who goes to whichever barber can fit me in, I found the piece on the angst she had trying to "break up" with her longtime hairstylist a little over the top, but in the good, extreme way that's characteristic of all good comedy. She says in the dedication that her accountant was the one who advised her to save her Amex statements, but don't be scared off by the accountant reference. This is anything but dry, financial stuff. Highly recommended.

hysterical - it went on my amex statement!

Got it. Read it. Loved it. A quick, really fun read with some great stories that grew out of what the author found when she looked back on her American Express bills. Stories that stand out are the one where she charged a pair of underwear to throw at a Tom Jones concert (hilarious), all the dating pieces ( like when she ordered chicken soup to deliver to her sick boyfriend and he freaked), and the section where she talks about all the Chinese food she's eaten over time and makes some hilarious observations (like why do we all know what dishes the Chinese have for dinner or lunch, but we had no idea what they eat for breakfast? And her guesses on why you never see a woman delivering Chinese food). The only negatives were that it could have been a little longer, and since I've always looked at my charge bills and thought how they remind me about where I ate, who I ate with, etc., I'm just sorry someone beat me to this.