Speaking of Boys: Answers to the Most-Asked Questions About Raising Sons

by Michael G. Thompson and Teresa Barker

Book Overview

My eight-year-old son is the only boy in his class who doesn't have a Gameboy. I don't want him to be ostracized for not having one, but I worry that it's addictive. What do you think? Our two sons are eleven and fourteen, and they are fiercely competitive. The tension around our house is awful. How can we help them get along better? We've worked very hard to keep our ten-year-old son in touch with his feelings. Sometimes it seems as if we've put...

• Format: Paperback
• Language: English
• ISBN: 0345441486
• ISBN13: 9780345441485
• Release Date: August 2000
• Publisher: Random House Publishing Group
• Length: 352 Pages
• Weight: 0.42 lbs.
• Dimensions: 0.8" x 5.6" x 8.2"

Customer Reviews

There is nothing wrong with my son

After another unpleasant meeting with my 9 year-old's teacher, my husband and I began to feel thoroughly discouraged and worried. I decided to do some research, came across this book, and nearly wept with relief. Our current school system is dominated by women who fail to understand the psychology of boys. Prior to having sons, I believed that boys were rambunctious and agressive due to socialization. Like most parents, I learned otherwise; boys are different - and this does not make them bad. I am tired of teachers saying the word "boys" while rolling their eyes, as if being a boy implies the existence of some inherent defect. It's insulting, unfair, and serves to seriously damage our sons' chances of doing well academically. Boys are in an educational crisis - and it's a manufactured one. If you have a son who kicks over the neighbour's snowman, climbs on the roof of the school, falls off his chair in class, gets into fights on the playground, annoys his teachers, blurts things out, and is generally considered a "problem", chances are, he's absolutely normal. Our intolerance to the energy of boys has led to millions of male children being medicated. It's an outrage, and parents need to confront the school systems and their attempts to feminize the male population. They can't run, they can't jump, they can't be competitive. They're supposed to act like girls, all quiet and co-operative, and when they don't - out with the ritalin. Here's something I learned: Our son has never been allowed a toy gun, and yet he draws them constantly, tries to find books on guns in the library, chews his toast into the shape of a pistol, etc. His teacher was concerned, and called us in for a meeting about it. This is a child who does not play video games, watch violence on tv, and is encouraged to be kind and compassionate. But there he is, drawing pictures of gangsters with machine guns. This book explained that it's a pretty normal thing. Our son got in trouble at school and lied to us about it. Again, fairly typical. Our son is easily distracted - why? Because of "co-operative learning" where kids' desks are all shoved together. This works for GIRLS, not boys! I requested an alternative seating arrangement. If you're worried about your son, you must read this book. It has changed my life. By the way, I'm a highschool teacher - I look at my male students completely differently now. Boys are lovely - there was a time when we knew this. This books has made me fall inlove with my boys all over again.

I was reminded what it was like to be 12 and confused.

I buy more books than I find time to read them. Occasionally I come across a book that grabs my attention, hooks me in, and refuses to let me put it down. Such is the case in regard to "Speaking of Boys". I was spending time in the book section of a local Target store while my ll and 12 year-old boys were checking out toys and video games. The book's cover photo grabbed my attention. Flipping through the book and its questions, I found the presentation attractive, bought it, and began reading it during subway rides to and from work. I came to understand a lot of issues that I never fully comprehended as a twelve year old. I was surprised by some of the "facts" of teenage boys, such as how they view sex, why they feel a need to fight authority while needing hugs, when "wet dreams" begin and how to explain the phenomenon, etc. I have highly recommended the book to many. It's easy to digest, accessible to just about anyone, and oftentimes explains difficult issues with a touch of humor. Check it out!

Answers Questions We (Especially Dads) Should Be Asking!

This is a wonderfully engaging book. I usually struggle through the initial chapters (only) of the traditional "expert advice on child rearing" books which my wife is always plowing through. Thankfully, I had no such problem here. In fact, for once I was excitedly reading portions of the book to her. This book deals with everything from war toys to pre-teen sex to parents just letting go, with many stops along the way. Highly recommended for those who want answers to everyday boy problems, especially before we make them into bigger teenager problems. I even put down my novels and biographies for this one! It will make you laugh ... and cry.

This book really does answer your questions about boys

Speaking of Boys is delightful to read, by turns funny, poignant, insightful, and informative. Michael Thompson clearly understands boys, but even more importantly, he understands the worries and concerns that parents and educators and therapists have about boys. If you enjoyed Raising Cain, as I did, you will like this book even more, because it is written in such an engaging style. I found myself starting by flipping around to the questions I specifically wanted to know about, and then just decided to read the whole thing, since all the answers were so fun and informative and at times, moving. If you haven't read Michael Thompson's other book on boys, then I'd suggest starting with this one, and moving on to raising Cain if you want more background and theory and in-depth clinical cases.