Sex, Romance, and the Glory of God: What Every Christian Husband Needs to Know

by C.J. Mahaney

Book Overview

"Scripture illuminates the path of marital intimacy. The Song ofSolomon shines brightly, showing us the way to the best sex we canpossibly experience."

"As practical as it is profound, Sex, Romance, and the Glory ofGod may well be the best book on marriage I've ever read. I wasmotivated to love my wife more and broadened in my understanding ofhow loving my wife brings glory to God . . . this book is truly atreasure."
Gary Thomas, author...

• Format: Hardcover
• Language: English
• ISBN: 1581346247
• ISBN13: 9781581346244
• Release Date: June 2004
• Publisher: Crossway Books
• Length: 128 Pages
• Weight: 0.48 lbs.
• Dimensions: 0.6" x 5.2" x 7.3"

Customer Reviews

Intimacy in Marriage a Reflection of God's Love for Us

C.J. Mahaney's book contains a simple but effective encouragement about romance within marriage. What is deeply appreciative about this small book is that it contains a simple message that acknowledges our sexuality within the marriage and how God designed it to be joyously pursued, and that it is to be a source of pleasure and true intimacy with one's wife. The writer also seeks to provide several ideas to inspire men to develop romance in their marriages. The book speaks of this profound truth that we often forget that is to love and know one's wife is deeply connected to the love, and joy of knowing God. For the Christian husband one should have one without the other.

A bit disappointed

All of the things the other reviewers say about this book are true. It's worth having and gives a Biblically-based view of what marriage is supposed to be about. Mahaney goes to the Song of Solomon to show that God designed sex to be enjoyed--delighted in--within the context of marriage and give several suggestions as to how a man can help to keep that spark in the marriage and the bedroom. However, I was a bit disappointed for a couple of reasons. First, it was rather short (check out the product details, not only the number of pages, but also the book's dimensions--it's kind of dinky). The main disappointment, though, was that I had already heard most of this before--from the author himself. I bought the book after hearing Mahaney's talk at a conference entitled "Sex and the Supremacy of Christ." I liked his talk and wanted to hear some more from him, so I ordered this book, but he had obviously used this book as the main source of material for the conference, and much of what was in the book was also in his talk. So, as I said, the book is good and it's worth having. However, for a bit more money one might want to consider going to [...] and ordering the excellent cd set entitled "Sex and the Supremacy of Christ", which has eight cd's, one of which includes much of the material found in this book.

C.J. Mahaney at His Best

I felt a deep sense of deja vu as I read Sex, Romance, and the Glory of God. It took me only a few pages to realize that this book, in a condensed form, forms the basis for a chapter in Sex and the Supremacy of Christ (edited by John Piper and Justin Taylor). I had enjoyed that particular chapter of Sex and the Supremacy of Christ and felt certain I would likewise enjoy this lengthened version. Sex, Romance, and the Glory of God is based loosely on the Song of Solomon. C.J. Mahaney shares my understanding of this book of the Bible stating simply, "It's about sex" (page 9). While many have attempted to allegorize Solomon's song, few have succeeded with any degree of credibility. "That's right gentlemen." says Mahaney, "Solomon's Song of Songs is an entire book of the Bible devoted to the promotion of sexual intimacy within the covenant of marriage. It's an eight-chapter feast of unbridled, uninhibited, joyous immersion in verbal and physical expressions of passion between a man and a woman" (page 10). Amen. So as the reader prepares to read this book, he must prepare to celebrate God's gift of sex. The author says, "The purpose of the book you hold in your hands is to lead us back into God's ideal of joyful, unashamed, indulgent, loving sexuality in the context of marriage" (pages 14-15). This book is directed primarily to men, largely because it is the husband's role (not an author's) to lead his wife into a fuller understanding of what Scripture teaches about sexuality. Mahaney will provide the foundation men can build upon to discover with his wife how sex and romance can be done to the glory of God. Following an introductory chapter Mahaney uncovers the divine purpose for marriage. This, he teaches, is to reflect the relationship between Christ and the Church. He goes on in the next chapter to provide a piece of wisdom he considers the most important in the entire book: "In order for romance to deepen, you must touch the heart and mind of your wife before you touch her body" (page 28). Several chapters follow in which Mahaney offers specific ways of touching a wife's heart and mind in order to build the type of relationship God desires for a marriage. Turning to the actual act of consumation, he follows Solomon's lead, providing little in the way of specific details that might read like a to-do list. Instead he invites us to study and understand the Song of Solomon to understand what Solomon meant when he wrote, "Awake, O north wind, and come, O south wind! Blow upon my garden, let its spices flow. Let my beloved come to his garden, and eat its choicest fruits" (4:16). The book concludes with a chapter written by Carolyn Mahaney (C.J.'s wife) addressed to women. It is the fifth chapter ("The Pleasure of Purity") of her book Feminine Appeal: Seven Virtues of a Godly Wife and Mother. With lots of humor (much of it self-deprecating), but also compassion and sensitivity, Mahaney sets forth some principles that will bear much fruit in many mar

Marriage as God intended it

Sex - God created it, the world abuses it, and most Christians are embarrassed by it. The way the world treats sex is like using a Stradivarius violin to hammer in nails - a thing of wondrous beauty misused and trashed beyond all recognition. For years Christian men have been conned by TV, Hollywood and the press that marriage and sex is about personal pleasure. We have lost the vision of what God intended in marriage. CJ Mahaney's book returns us to the maker's instructions and restores a much profounder biblical perspective of romance within marriage as God intended it. He uses the Song of Solomon to illustrate how men should treat their wives. He puts the masterpiece of marriage back into its God-given frame, showing the significance of what marriage demonstrates - the relationship between Christ and his people. He calls Christian men to selfless sacrificial love, like Christ's love for his Church. He calls men to be leaders, a much-needed truth; and to be thoughtful caring servant husbands, possibly a more needed truth. One of the great lessons repeatedly brought home is: "Before you touch her body, touch her heart and mind." Too often men are more focused on their needs and pleasures. This is not what God intended in marriage - a selfless giving by each person. Mahaney then proceeds to illustrate what this means, and to help us men with the task of romancing our wives, and to develop marriages that go way beyond the physical side of the relationship. This book is a must read for all married men. Some may find Mahaney's frankness startling, but he deals with this delicate subject without being crude or explicit. Mahaney's wife, Carolyn, has added an appendix, "A Word to Wives", which contains much of what we might want to say to our wives, but are afraid to. Read this book, and put his suggestions into practice so that in a world where marriage is unfashionable and often self-serving, we will be able to live God-honouring, God-glorifying marriages. Men, buy it and surprise your wife. Ladies, buy it for your husbands.

Before You Touch Her Body, Touch Her Heart and Mind

That simple phrase is what all of us men need to hear: "Before you touch her body, touch her heart and mind." Cursorily using Song of Solomon as an illustration of true biblical covenant love, C.J. Mahaney has written one of the most useful books that I have ever read. This book is written for men. Men need to step up and lead in romancing the marriage. Therefore Mahaney asks that men don't read this book with their wives. Great intimacy, including sex is something that every marriage should be full of. If that is missing, it is primarily the husband's issue that he needs to fix. Then in chapter 2 he moves on to give the biblical God-given purpose for marriage from Ephesians 5: "A profound mystery, revealed to all to see." My favorite chapters then follow (3-6) in which Mahaney lets the readers draw from his life experiences, his successes and his failures, to help us with romancing our wives, touching their hearts and minds so that then touching their bodies is so much more intimate, frequent, and amazing. These chapters have been so useful to me. I'm not going to ruin it for you by giving you any of the advice here. But let me tell you that just taking advantage of the advice that he gives and the motivation that comes knowing that greater intimacy better glorifies God has already had a very noticeable impact in the two weeks since I finished my first reading of the book...so much so that my wife has told me whatever I read has changed me for the better. Finally he ends in chapter 7 with a mild exposition of Song of Solomon 8:5-7, "Strong as Death, The Enduring Power of Covenant Love." Marital love goes beyond just sex, but sex is truly only as amazing as God designed it to be in the context of marriage. Marital love is forever, it isn't dependent on sexual ability; it isn't dependent on perfection; it isn't dependent on emotions. Marital love comes for God and is a reflection of God's love for the church. Carolyn Mahaney, C.J.'s wife wrote the an appendix, "A Word to Wives" which I haven't read but have been told by my wife is very good. I too have noticed a difference in her since she has read that chapter and the book from which it comes "Feminine Appeal." I strongly recommend you read this book. I am in the middle of reading it a second time and plan on reading it and putting to action its suggestions until the day I die.