Self-Assertion for Women

By Pamela E. Butler

Book Overview

The bestselling assertiveness guide that shows women how to get what they want--reissued with a new preface by the author.

Self-Assertion for Women offers practical advice with realistic sample dialogues and step-by-step exercises showing women how they can:

learn to communicate clearly and effectively

protect themselves from misread signals in public, as well as intimate, situations

maintain professional authority without becoming aggressive

deal appropriately with sexual harassment

express positive and negative feelings without anxiety

set boundaries and assert themselves freely while maintaining loving relationships

idenify "assertiveness blind spots"

Butler's strategies can be applied by all women in any situation that requires direct, effective, and positive action.

• Format: Paperback
• Language: English
• ISBN: 0062501259
• ISBN13: 9780062501257
• Release Date: March 1992
• Publisher: HarperOne
• Length: 288 Pages
• Weight: 0.78 lbs.
• Dimensions: 0.7" x 5.0" x 8.3"

Customer Reviews

Great Help

If you have ever had trouble expressing your boundaries, this is the book for you. It gives clear concise ways to say No very clearly without being offensive. It changed the way I deal with those people who are slightly but annoyingly obnoxious. I had a house guest who didn't seem to be leaving. The situation gave me a headache, as my "hints" were not working. I read the book, decided what to say, said it, and was amazed at how easily I was understood and respected.

Still hugely helpful after all these years

While geared toward women, this book also contains much that's proven useful to men I know. Butler offers accessible, sensible advice on, among other subjects, how to set limits, handle criticism, and distinguish between assertiveness and aggressiveness. The chapter "What Are You Telling Yourself?" serves as a fine introduction to self-talk; for more on this topic, see Butler's other classic, "Talking to Yourself." So many of us have been trained to "be nice at any cost"--even when doing so means suppressing and denying our most essential selves and thereby incurring a host of unfortunate consequences, from not fulfilling our potential to full-blown chronic depression (with which women are diagnosed at a rate nearly twice that observed in men). One chapter, "Slef-Assertion in Your Professional Life," contains a fine section on "Positive Self-Presentation," which discusses why women often have such a hard time acknowledging their own competence, strengths, and accomplishments; it's worth a review by anyone who wants to succeed in the business world.

Butler's book is a classic; it's information has lasting value for women--and men too.

Pamela Butler does a terrific and thorough job walking women through the obstacles we face to asserting ourselves. She explains step-by-step with numerous examples and sample scripts how to assert in a way that respects both oneself and the other. Over the years I have found this book excellent personally and professionally. After recommending it to patients in my psychotherapy practice, I have been impressed by how they have been able to incorporate Butler's teachings into their lives. Butler writing combines serious professionalism with a down-to-earth approach that is accessible to people of all levels of psychological sophistication. While women have some gender related issues that canget in the way of self-assertion, they do not have a monopoly on difficulties in this area; many men can gain much from reading this book.