Real Ultimate Power

by Robert Hamburger

Book Overview

Dear Stupid Idiots,

A lot of you have been saying that I don't know anything about REAL ninjas. But that's a bunch of bull crap You dummies don't know anything. And maybe YOU should get a life. I bet a lot of you have never even seen a girl naked You idiots believe that ninjas had some "code of honor." Yeah right If by "code of honor," you mean "code to flip out and go nuts for absolutely no reason at all even if it means that people...

• Format: Paperback
• Language: English
• ISBN: 080652569X
• ISBN13: 9780806525693
• Release Date: July 2004
• Publisher: Kensington Publishing Corporation
• Length: 160 Pages
• Weight: 0.54 lbs.
• Dimensions: 0.6" x 5.5" x 8.2"

Customer Reviews

The new Adrian Mole or Holden Caulfield.

I bought this book after reading the hilarious "Real Ultimate Power" website, and I expected to find an extension of the humourous made-up encyclopedia of ninja knowledge. Indeed, the book does contain most of the website's content, and a wealth of new ninja-based content. However, there is a far deeper and darker story going on between the lines that gives the reader much more than they bargained for. This is the story of an unhappy child. Nobody understands him, and he understands nobody. Feeling neglected by his disfunctional parents and shunned by his peers, Robert both hides and expresses himself within his own fantasy world. Ninjas are like his imaginary friends, his heroes, and his outlet for revenge fantasies. As Robert descends further into his world, real life events are distorted and exaggerated, and eventually Robert comes to the conclusion that there is only one way out. It is a surprisingly dark and serious book, but definitely with some hilarious moments, usually coming from Robert's unique way of describing and relating to characters and events. If you buy it looking for more of the insane ninja-related ramblings of the website, you won't be disappointed - but this book doesn't let you get away with just laughing at Robert's craziness. Prepare to be taken down the slippery slope as Robert's grip on his life is eroded. There are moments where your laughter is stopped short when you realise what Robert is getting at, and the realisation that this isn't going to end well is a powerful one. All in all, this is destined to be a cult classic. It might not get through to everyone, and it is doomed to be misunderstood by people who take it at face value, much the same as the website. This author has a lot of tricks up his sleeve, and not all of them will leave you feeling comfortable. Darker than either "The Secret Diary of Adrian Mole aged 13 1/4" or "The Catcher In The Rye", this book is a unique and deeply affecting insight into a disturbed young mind.

The new Adrian Mole or Holden Caulfield.

I bought this book after reading the hilarious "Real Ultimate Power" website, and I expected to find an extension of the humourous made-up encyclopedia of ninja knowledge. Indeed, the book does contain most of the website's content, and a wealth of new ninja-based content. However, there is a far deeper and darker story going on between the lines that gives the reader much more than they bargained for. This is the story of an unhappy child. Nobody understands him, and he understands nobody. Feeling neglected by his disfunctional parents and shunned by his peers, Robert both hides and expresses himself within his own fantasy world. Ninjas are like his imaginary friends, his heroes, and his outlet for revenge fantasies. As Robert descends further into his world, real life events are distorted and exaggerated, and eventually Robert comes to the conclusion that there is only one way out. It is a surprisingly dark and serious book, but definitely with some hilarious moments, usually coming from Robert's unique way of describing and relating to characters and events. If you buy it looking for more of the insane ninja-related ramblings of the website, you won't be disappointed - but this book doesn't let you get away with just laughing at Robert's craziness. Prepare to be taken down the slippery slope as Robert's grip on his life is eroded. There are moments where your laughter is stopped short when you realise what Robert is getting at, and the realisation that this isn't going to end well is a powerful one. All in all, this is destined to be a cult classic. It might not get through to everyone, and it is doomed to be misunderstood by people who take it at face value, much the same as the website. This author has a lot of tricks up his sleeve, and not all of them will leave you feeling comfortable. Darker than either "The Secret Diary of Adrian Mole aged 13 1/4" or "The Catcher In The Rye", this book is a unique and deeply affecting insight into a disturbed young mind.

Not what I expected

First of all, the realultimatepower website is hilarious. I was expecting the book to be similar to the site. At first glance it is. Then you start reading the footnotes. This isn't a book about ninjas at all. This is the story of an outsider kid no one likes. A kid whose parents see him as an accident that got in the way of their lives. A kid who wants to just connect with someone so badly that he sees his dog as "what a mom should be, but furrier." A kid who fantasizes about being kidnapped by a stranger and taken away from everything that hurts him. I could not put this book down and I literally read it cover-to-cover nonstop. The book continues to get less and less hilarious the further you get as more and more of the true story comes out. I didn't expect it, but Real Ultimate Power is one great book.

Genius.

Ever have an obsession when you were a kid? Something you loved so much that you couldn't stop talking about it to anyone and everyone? Multiply that by 100 and you get Robert Hamburger, the fictional author/protagonist of the book. While the book is primarily made up of the same material that is posted on the website, the true point of the book is hidden in it's footnotes. Through conversations with his babysitter/co-writer, dog, parents and psychologist, we follow Robert's story and delve into the psyche of a pretty messed up little kid. What a lot of people dont seem to get is that the book, like the site, isn't actually about Ninjas. It's not REALLY a ninja hand guide, or a history lesson. The point isnt to educate, the point is to tell the story of a troubled kid who buries himself in a ninja fantasy in order to escape his negligant parents, over-critical teachers and to compensate for his lack of friends. As a kid we all had times when we wished we could run away to the circus, or could go live in outer space, or whatever, because we felt like we couldn't indentify with anyone.. this book is simply the story of a kid going through that kind of period in his life. And for everyone that claims that the website and the book may cause kids to "flip out and kill each other," I believe that the book actually encourages the exact opposite. Robert is facsinated with killing and violence because it's what he wants to do to the people that have hurt him in his life, or he wants to find a ninja friend to do it... hell, we've seen children and young adults in this situation before a few years back, and we've seen the consequences of such pent up anger. This book is not an advocate of violence, but a warning as to what can happen when we try to force kids to abandon childish things, pump them full of medicine and "discipline" in order to make them grow up fast, rather than encourage them to be silly, dream and savor every momment of their childhood. I for one did not expect this level of complexity in this book, but I was totally floored after finishing it. Comedy, especially parody, has always been the best forum for social commentary, and this book masters it. If you hate the site, or if you don't get it, spend the $10 and read the book and I'm pretty sure you'll change your opinion. This book is genius: and by genius, I mean totally sweet.

Ninja Please!

I can't describe how amazingly funny this book is! It's been a long time since I actually laughed out loud from reading a book. Several times while reading I had to put the book down because I got so pumped that I thought I was going to uppercut myself in the nuts!I loved the website and this book follows in the same tradition with its insane, sick humor. I can't believe the people who bash this book for not teaching real ninjitsu! How stupid can you be?! While reading those bad reviews all I could hear in my head were guitars wailing and I got so pumped that I almost threw myself down the stairs!! You guys need to get a life right now or else; just picture yourself covered with ninja stars!