Song lyrics these days are so boring aren't they? Whether we're listening to the singer telling us that they 'love you baby, yes I do, whoo-hoo' or if they're walking slowly down a hall faster than a cannon ball, it's all a bit tiresome. However, have you ever thought what these same songs would be like if they were written by pretentious professors of the English Language? Suddenly, the singer isn't 'Mr. Blue Sky', he's 'The gentleman with the nomenclature...