Negotiation Generation: Take Back Your Parental Authority Without Punishment

by Lynne Griffin

Book Overview

The classic power struggle between parents and children- demystified. Nationally recognized behavior management expert Lynne Reeves Griffin offers a commonsense yet radical approach to parenting that will enable adults to win the tug-of-war with their children about what is, and isn't, acceptable behavior. This proactive plan provides parents with the tools to reclaim their authority, establish boundaries, and cease negotiation tactics such as rewards...

• Format: Paperback
• Language: English
• ISBN: 0425217019
• ISBN13: 9780425217016
• Release Date: September 2007
• Publisher: Berkley Books
• Length: 272 Pages
• Weight: 0.64 lbs.
• Dimensions: 0.8" x 5.6" x 8.2"
• Age Range: 18 years and up
• Grade Range: Postsecondary and higher

Customer Reviews

Stepmother

Finally, a book that appeals to your common sense! I highly recommend this book to step parents as well as the real moms and dads. The principals they teach in this book make sense and work! This is the book that should be sent home from the hospital with your newborn.

Proactive Parenting at its Best

Lynne Reeves Griffin offers no-nonsense advice for "taking back parental authority without punishment." From establishing kid-friendly lifestyles rather than adult-centered lives for children, organizing early dinner and bedtime rituals that allow a child to perform well in these areas before they're too tired, demanding respect for all members of a household, building fences and adjusting them as a child grows not only in size and age but in emotional ability to manage more responsibilities and freedoms, to refusing to react emotionally or to talk (and talk and talk!) in the middle of a conflict involving rules that are supposedly non-negotiable, Lynne's strategies for working with rather than against a child while maintaining family order and parental sanity are all simple to understand and implement. I'd recommend this book to any parent or other adults who care for children. Since successful proactive parenting involves planning, reading this book before conflicts arise is one of the wisest moves a new parent can make!

Kind Advice

Lynne Griffin approaches parenting with compassion and an endless supply of common sense -- all without passing judgment on the foundering parent. Negotiation Generation is that book you want to carry with you on trips to the supermarket when the 3-year-old is having a meltdown in aisle 5, when you visit your dear friend and her combustible teen, when your own patience wears thin and you no longer know where to draw the line. Ms. Griffin's mantra is, "If you can predict it, you can prevent it." She teaches parents to understand their children's temperment, the harm in a parent's desire to make a child adhere to an adult's lifestyle, and how to decide when to talk vs. when to act. The lessons learned in Negotiation Generation are ones which can be applied to all relationships. She teaches the reader to establish boundaries and honor them. Buy this book in bulk, you'll want all your friends to read it.

Makes Sense and Works!

There were immediate results when I started to apply the concepts in this book. By predicting and preparing, there absolutely was less fuss, less stress, and specific situations were simpler for us all to handle. The analogy of life as a backyard, and parents' responsibility to create strong fences and to place age-appropriate options within the yard, was easy to understand and explain to others. Setting clear expectations and learning when not to talk sounds simple, but few of us do it, or do it right, and this book shows how so effectively!

A parental "aha" moment.

This is the second book I have read by Lynne Griffin. The first book was recommended to me by my son's preschool teacher. And when I heard a new one was coming out - I grabbed it. He is a very, very, very persistent and energetic (now) 7 year old and has always absolutely refused to take no for an answer. My husband and I were at the end of our combined ropes. We would witness his behavior and melt down and then react, mostly with anger. Our interpretation of Griffins approach is that you "get ahead" of the misbehavior and steer your child right around it. You sit your child down BEFORE anything happens and CALMLY explain WHAT is going to happen if they engage in their typical problem behavior (not listening, whatever it is.) and then CALMLY FOLLOW THROUGH with the consequences. Sounds reasonable enough - but we realized we weren't getting ahead of the situation rather we just lived in the chaos of the moment. We felt we were being demoralized by a child. We figured if we warned once, warned twice, warned three times and then ended up yelling that it was our son's fault. Well - of course it isn't, we just assumed he knew the right ways to react - we told him - loudly - all the time. This book tells you how to avoid this. I have to say when we actually are organized and using the methods, life is calmer and we feel more respect for each other and ourselves. Great book.