Mozart and the Whale: An Asperger's Love Story

by Jerry Newport and Mary Newport

Book Overview

This riveting and inspiring memoir is penned by a couple who fell in love, fell apart, and finally overcame the pressures of fame, family, and Asperger's Syndrome to build a life together.

• Format: Hardcover
• Language: English
• ISBN: 074327282X
• ISBN13: 9780743272827
• Release Date: January 2007
• Publisher: Touchstone Books
• Length: 265 Pages
• Weight: 0.88 lbs.
• Dimensions: 0.9" x 6.1" x 8.6"

Customer Reviews

Their honesty is refreshing.

This book is an honest account of growing up autistic. The authors do not, as many authors on the spectrum do, attempt to force-fit their lives into some sort of mold. They describe their lives as they were, the good, the bad, and the ugly. In doing so, they have made a book that's easier for me as an autistic person to identify with, than a lot of the books in which people fit themselves to a mold. I loved reading about Mary's increased trouble in school during adolescence, I had the same problem, and some of the same responses to it. While it was a confusing and horrible time in my life as far as my own experience of it goes, it might have been less confusing if I'd had a book like this at the time. If Mary Newport reads this, I want to thank her for writing about that. I also like their unflinching looks at their flaws. The ability to look at oneself honestly without shying away from the bad parts is something I have admired, and wanted to emulate, for some time. The most important thing that I got out of this book, more than the many complex details in the lives of the authors, was the honesty, the ability to tell it like it was to the best of the authors' ability. I am glad they wrote it, and glad to read it: It is a refreshing change from a lot of what's out there in the world of autism literature.

Painful, poignant, and hilarious: a rocky road to love

Jerry and Mary were both adults before they learned there was a name for the way they were - Asperger's Syndrome - or "autism-lite" as Jerry dubs it. They met in middle age after a lifetime of no relationships (him) or destructive relationships (her), and their moving, painful and funny memoir starts out at their nadir - apart and suicidal. But even as Jerry lies miserable, waiting for the 60 pills he took to do their job, he's distracted. "For an instant, I started to obsess about the number sixty, mulling over what an interesting number it is and how I never imagined I'd die because of it. Sixty is the product of 2 times 2 times 3 times 5. Sixty is the number of degrees of arc covered by the side of a hexagon inscribed inside a circle. Each side equals the radius, and the hexagon is made of six equilateral triangles linked together. Fold them all outside and you get six more, forming a total of twelve which makes a Star of David with one equilateral triangle for each tribe of Israel...." Jerry is a numbers savant who aced an actuarial exam without the prerequisite education, but couldn't get through the interview. He's worked mostly as a courier and a cab driver. Mary is an artistic savant. Painting and music are her passions and she, too, has had a series of jobs, including cook and hairdresser. Taking off from the lowest point, they alternate chapters, tracing their lives from childhood and the frustrations and loneliness they felt trying to fit in. Much of it is painful; attempts to cope with confusion and alienation, bullying from other children, intense family dynamics. But there are joyous moments of epiphany and accomplishment - usually alone. And there is humor throughout. Their early relationship is wildly joyous. They delight in each other's talents and eccentricities. But when they move in together things change. Jerry is regimented and insecure; Mary is spontaneous and unpredictable. Jerry is given to terrible tantrums, Mary is plagued by depression. By the time they marry their relationship is hanging on by sheer will, rather than compromise and understanding. Neither of them are any good at reading non-verbal cues or putting themselves in the other's place. But neither wants to be alone and there are enough good times to put off the inevitable crash and burn. The alternating chapters illuminate one another. There are surprises - things that loom large for one go unmentioned by the other, for instance, and the honesty, brutal at times, is both disarming and uncomfortable. We know from the beginning that they reconcile. The learning curve as they begin to manage their demons and consider one another more deliberately is affecting and admirable. The Newports' memoir offers an intimate window on life and love with Aspergers. Their quirks and brilliance enliven the narrative and show the reader a different perspective on the world. An eye-opening, heart-wrenching read, leavened with humor and hope.

An intelligent and thoughtful perspective on life, love, and Asperger Syndrome

Jerry Newport and Mary Meinel Newport's Mozart and the Whale is an honest and engrossing account of two adults on the spectrum who meet, fall in love, and don't necessarily live happily ever after. This affecting memoir manages to be both bluntly candid and romantic: while the Newports clearly love each other, love is not at first enough for two such complex people. One of the most valuable contributions this book makes is its demonstration of the social and emotional learning that can go on well into adulthood, learning that makes the Newports' second try at marriage more successful.

A fascinating look into the lives of a couple who both suffer from Asperger's Syndrome

Asperger's syndrome is one of the many branches on the gnarled and crooked tree called autism. People with AS tend to be highly intelligent or creative or both, but socially inept to an extreme (and, as this book shows, sometimes hilarious) degree. Some of them, like Jerry Newport, are savants who have the ability to calculate numbers and dates. Some, like Jerry's wife Mary, have prodigious artistic talents. Jerry met Mary at a party for adults with AS organized by Jerry's Los Angeles-based group, AGUA (Adults Gathering, United and Autistic). He had attempted to fashion a whale costume expressing his adoration of Free Willy, and she arrived in the guise of Nannerl Mozart, the brilliant musician whose life was overshadowed by her famous brother. It wasn't exactly love at first sight, but when the two realized they both kept pet cockatiels it was sealed. A scant 20 weeks later they were married, both of them experiencing an exciting sense of being fully understood and intimately acceptable that had eluded them previously. The book is written in tandem --- first Jerry speaks, then Mary, in episodes. It can become a little confusing even for the avid reader, because of its many time jumps and some repetitions. But if you were fascinated by the movie Rainman (as Jerry was, finding in it his first real affirmation), then you will want to take in the whole saga of Mary and Jerry. Both had miserable childhoods filled with basic misunderstandings about how the world works and major rejections by family and peers. Of the two, Mary had "lived" most. Shunted away by her parents to a strict religious cult in mid-adolescence, she had two children and many lovers, lived in caves and deserts and the streets of San Francisco. Her only successful employment was as a piano tuner. A tall attractive woman with outbursts of extroversion, she admits that having AS isn't as difficult for a woman (it's also much rarer) because snagging ordinary men isn't the same problem for autistic women as getting normal women is for autistic men. In college, Jerry once overheard his frat brothers talking about his remarkably high incidence of first dates. He usually could charm a woman sufficient to go out for coffee but soon found her interest waning, after which he might call her numerous times without success. He had no idea what ordinary people talk about, and little empathy for the feelings of others. He once had sex with a young woman and, immediately after the act, sincerely grilled her for ways to land a date with another girl he'd been trying to meet. Despite his education, Jerry wound up driving a cab and living in desperate loneliness. Starting AGUA was a step out of the pit. Finding Mary was a relief and a learning experience. In marriage much of the anger that the two had left unexplored came out --- at each other. Jerry had no problems expressing it, which caused his wife to fall into deeper and more crushing depressions. Having a "60 Minutes" show focus on

[...] review of Mozart and the Whale

Is there such a thing as a soul mate; another person who is destined to be with you? For Jerry Newport and Mary Newport, the answer is `yes.' Mozart and the Whale: An Asperger's Love Story details the relationship of two Aspies (individuals with Asperger's Syndrome, a form of Autism) who fall in love at first sight. This touching story chronicles their life of misunderstanding and loneliness leading up to and beyond the moment they met, which changed them both forever. Mozart and the Whale is a compelling tale about the power of love and its ability to overcome everything, even among two individuals with Asperger's Syndrome. But the story it tells is something to which we can all relate. It provides hope to those of us who have been lonely our entire lives. Perhaps we will one day be able to experience true love, when we least expect it. Read WrongPlanet.net for the full review