Reminding women that motherhood is an option, not a given (much less an instinct), New York psychotherapist Phyllis Ziman Tobin contends that choosing to be or not to be a mother is the defining rite of passage for today's woman. She draws on the composite struggles of real people to show how the dilemma is rooted in unexamined assumptions about normalcy, fear of change and loss of control, and the not always audible voices of our own mothers. Dr...