For 250 years the author's family spread across the globe, helping to expand the British Empire and paint the map red. This is a personal reckoning with that dubious legacy, echoing down to the present in South Africa. It begins with the 'discovery' of Tahiti in 1767 by an ancestor, from whose log book Rostron reveals that his sailors were exchanging the ship's nails for sex with Tahitian maidens so that HMS Dolphin began, literally, to fall apart...