Letting Go: A 12-Week Personal Action Program to Overcome a Broken Heart

by Tracy Cabot and Zev Wanderer

Book Overview

Are you crying over sad songs? Seeing his or her face in every crowd? Aching with loneliness and hoping the phone will ring? Feeling that no one else can give your life meaning? Losing a loved one is the most devastating crisis of intimate living. It can jeopardize your health . . . even your life. You might think only passing time will ease your pain, but now you can begin to end the hurt today. Within three months you can erase painful memories,...

• Format: Mass Market Paperback
• Language: English
• ISBN: 0440147301
• ISBN13: 9780440147305
• Release Date: August 1987
• Publisher: Random House Publishing Group
• Length: 320 Pages
• Weight: 1.20 lbs.
• Dimensions: 0.9" x 4.2" x 6.7"

Customer Reviews

Help With Self Help

I just bought this book and I am so angry---because I could have used it so much sooner! It has been four months and I am finally doing ok after a rancid, horrendous end to a four-cohabitating relationship. I am finally emerging from the betrayal induced depression and putting back on the 15 pounds that I violently threw up and now, I find this book, now! While it is still totally a phenomenal resource, it sure could have saved me so much heartache during the first few days-it would have calmed me down, brought me back to earth, assured me that everything I was experiencing was ok and that I was not going to die because there in the book was the evidence that I was not going to die from the searing pain in my chest...others had survived it and they were writing about it! It also would have given me some direction other than to the toilet and the bed. With this kind of break up one doesn't know which end is up and this book starts with ok, this is what you are feeling (I mean, it nails every feeling I experienced) and then gives you direction to break your addiction to the person, with instructions as simple as, "ok, put on your left sock first..." Today, feeling as I have regained composure and feel level headed, the book is still extremely helpful, it is teaching me that being in love, is in fact being addicted to that loved one and I became so used to having my ex with me as a partner in life, someone to eat with, take care of me when I was sick, laugh with...blah, etc., blah...all the relationship stuff, well it is an addiction. So this book helps with this elusive addiction oh hell, it just helps. If you are in pain, this should help.

I "Let Go" Thanks To This Book!

Loved it! Loved it! Loved it! This book made all the difference in the world when it came to helping me get over my Ex. Great exercises. Many of which have stuck with me all of these years (about 7 now!). I actually have used them to get over other "harmful" situations in my life since. This is one of four books that really changed my life. The others are: How To Survive The Loss Of A Love; Surviving, Healing & Growing (The companion workbook to How To Survive The Loss Of a Love); and The Breakup Diary (a guided journal with leading paragraphs that help you get rid of the negative and start thinking positive). If you're having trouble letting go...you have to get this book!

Reading this book will lift you out of the darkness...

I have been using this book since 1988 to get me through the big break-ups in my life. If it wasn't for this book, things would have gone so much slower. My therapist gave me a copy and I have been buying copies ever since for friends as gifts. This is a must have reference book in this world. Help yourself out and ease the pan, believe me--this isn't your average crappy self-help book that gets you nowhere. There is so much humor and realness in this book--these authors understand the pain process and have made my life so much easier. I think everyone should have a copy of this book. Yes, I think that you should buy it, especially since nothing in this world is permanent and you must take care of yourself. There isn't another book that I have suggested more in the last 15 years, I just wish that I didn't have too.

Good Advice, with One Caveat

This book has excellent advice, however I think that in this age of AIDS and other sexually-transmitted diseases, it is not advisable to follow the "it's okay to have sex with somebody just because they're there and they're nice" suggestion on page 63 -- the broken-hearted has enough emotional troubles to deal with -- without getting a possibly fatal, or incurable, STD to add to their problems.The feelings of the other 'nice' person who could be falling in love with the newly broken-hearted person is also not considered. Advice like this would not be fair to the new person and may break their heart in turn. After all, they don't know they are being used for sex because "they are there and they're nice."Promiscuity really shouldn't be promoted to people as one of the cure-alls for a broken heart.

So you want to crank call him.......

I read this book when I broke up with my boyfriend of 7 years. Considering the book says it will take half of that time to overcome the relationship - I decided the book was worth reading because there was no way I was waiting another 3 years to get over this relationship. It was very easy to read - and as a woman - I did follow the steps. I would read the same chapter over again for that week if I felt weak and sometimes just to take up time so I wasn't watching bad tv that would make me think of "HIM". I put all the memories in a box, etc., as suggested in the book. After three months the book did help me, alot. The book makes you realize that you are normal and it is ok to have creepy fingers to crank call him and hang up. That it is ok to be angry and tell him that,and that it is ok to cry when you hear a song or look at his picture. Eventually, the book made me not want to call him or yell at him or tell him what I really thought of him. The book helps you to realize that you need to be good to yourself and get back in the game of life. After all - just because you had one bad apple doesn't mean that the whole bunch of apples are rotten.I would definately recommend!