Knights Without Armor

by Aaron R. Kipnis

Book Overview

Knights Without Armor: A Guide to The Inner Lives of Men By Aaron R. Kipnis, Ph.D. A powerful volume and helpful guide - Publishers Weekly Thoughtful and provocative - San Francisco Chronicle Kipnis'... This description may be from another edition of this product.

• Format: Paperback
• Language: English
• ISBN: 0874776589
• ISBN13: 9780874776584
• Release Date: September 1991
• Publisher: TarcherPerigee
• Weight: 1.30 lbs.

Customer Reviews

I understood way.

I understood after reading the book in swedish way I lost contact with my now 14 years old doughter Emelie Finette, living in Westheim/Marsberg. I have seen her for only 6 hours totaly.I also understood that we parents who wants to have equal rights for the children will have a long way to go yet.Thanks Aaron for a wounderfull book.Tommy Jonsson

Finding My Masculine Soul

Aaron Kipnis has put into words what I have felt for many years. He says that the "value placed on men's lives, as compared to women's, is greatly depreciated in our culture." It starts with how male infants are treated by their mothers right up to how devalued were the lives of so many men who fought in Vietnam. Had it been women who were dying senseless deaths over there, Kipnis points out, the war would not have lasted near as long.He tell us in a way that resonates with me that, "Men frequently feel disconnected from an authentic source of aliveness within us." Maybe it is because so many of us have constructed an "heroic personality that is hard, inflexible and, like the armor of old, heavy to drag around." This book was given to me by a friend who, with me, is a member of The Mankind Project, New Warrior Community, a group that Kipnis talks about in his book. The book has helped me to really understand the obsessive overachieving and workaholism of so many men and how they have numbed their lives and avoided real intimacy with both men and women in their lives, especially their significant others. (In reality, not very significant!)Kipnis says, "This numbness includes loss of emotional and even physical sensitivity." Men come home and escape into a few beers and the tube or even worse. The price we pay, he says, is pain: isolation, alienation, stressed-induced illnesses, sex and love addictions, codependence (taking care of our women before even thinking of ourselves and being dependent on them for approval), fear and anxiety and God knows how much more.This is a powerful book and an easy read. It is mesmerizing because it is so damn true and accurate. Kipnis does not stop at describing this devastating phenomenon. He offers up many ways for us to seek healing. He tells women readers that they would do well to listen carefully to what they can do to help the men in their lives starting with their male infants and sons. He encourages us to join men's groups and seek therapy from psychologists who understand the acute losses to the masculine soul and may be wounded healers themselves. He shows us that the spiritual dimension of life is critical for our emotional and mental health and that sharing openly with other men the pain and fear we're experiencing is the beginning of healing.Kipnis speaks of the "uninitiated male". We in the New Warriors understand him when he says that the uninitiated male has many problems. He quotes another author who says about Shakespeare's Hamlet: He has "no roots in the instinctive world--and he makes only division and tragedy of [the divine and sacred] in us, not paradox and synthesis." Kipnis says, "The narcissistic male, unable to wield the power of the father, cannot generate and protect life or transform the world, only devalue it.---Hamlet retreats into immobility as a defense against the conflicting emotions he feels."I like the way Kipnis tells the real stories of pain, healing and joy that he and his m

An overview of ways in which men are remaking themselves

Aaron Kipnis offers a comprehensive view of all aspects of the men's movement in this 302-page volume. Inspired by issues raised by members of an addiction/recovery men's group headed by the author, the book looks at various male images. Kipnis critically examines the old masculine values of the "heroic" male as well as those of the newer, sensitive man (what Kipnis calls the "feminized" man), and addresses at length the emerging "authentic, integrated" masculinity inspired by Robert Bly and friends. Intertwined with these accounts are stories and vignettes from men in the group, new knights of the round table on a quest for a new masculine paradigm. Although the metaphor of the knights seems to get a little corny at times, the book has much to recommend it. This is the first, if not the only, book that globally looks at all facets of the men's movement. Everything from circumsicion, to myth, ritual and initiation, to the politics of male-bashing, is covered. There is an excellent table comparing the masculine images of the heroic, feminized, and integrated man and looking at how these differ along physical, mental, and emotional lines. There is a section on men's resources, with names and addresses of organizations and suggestions on how to get involved. Also, unlike most books on men's issues, this one actually has an index--a refreshing feature indeed!