Journey Through Life: Finding Strength In Times Of Trouble And Hopeless Situations

By Callista Miller

In the grand scheme of life, everybody needs somebody. Furthermore, life is generally more enriching and fulfilling if we are there for one another. Sometimes, however, the weight distribution within relationships is disproportionate, such that one person is carrying more of the emotional weight within a relationship. It is this disproportionate weight that sets grounds for the development of the Strong One role because we continue to allow ourselves to be the dumping ground in these relationships. I know this may sound a bit unfair, even harsh, but for many of us, our position as the Strong One often come about through invitation. Just a simple statement like, "You can come to me anytime " opens doors, albeit unintentionally, whereby you may find that someone actually takes you up on the offer. The first time the offer is taken up might be a trial to see if you will really be available, open, positive, and a safe space. But this first positive experience will, in many ways, set the foundation for future interactions. This one positive experience increases the likelihood of you becoming the person who is consulted on the next occasion when support is needed. Being a source of support for one person on occasion is one story, but becoming the source of support for multiple persons who may or may not have emotionally-demanding lives is another story. Whether your support is at your invitation or not, at the core of this experience, and what maintains the role as the Strong One, is lack of boundaries. These boundaries provide the parameters within which you are accessible, and as such, without clear and consistent boundaries, you will find yourself available for anyone and possibly everyone at any time. As we prepare to jump into the profile stories, I will start with the one I am most familiar with: the Counselor. For those who identify as Counselors, the Strong One designation comes easily because it is almost like second nature. Whether you are the oldest child or the oldest in your circle, in a leadership role or working within the helping fields (e.g., psychology or social work), you may find that many come to you, finding you a comfortable and safe space for many of life's challenges. The other profiles have overlaps with the counselor, but they have key elements that distinguish them. The siblings, the Rock, and the Savior, find that their Strong One genesis is connected to a negative, traumatic event or series of events occurring earlier in life. These siblings intended to be strong as a way to withstand the chaos within which they were embedded, and the persona of strength became a defining feature of their lives. Finally, you will be introduced to the Leader/Socialite, whose story differs the most. This Strong One finds herself in an ocean of obligations due to social status. While it is possible that underlying personality traits and/or a negative event may be present, the thrust of this role is to maintain appearances as a responsibility because of the public nature of your life. You, the reader, will find that going through the profiles will help you to better understand the genesis of your own role, whether you identify with either of the four presented or not.

• Format: Paperback
• Language: English
• ISBN: 1798055120
• ISBN13: 9781798055120
• Release Date: February 2019
• Publisher: Independently Published
• Length: 88 Pages
• Weight: 0.25 lbs.
• Dimensions: 0.2" x 5.5" x 8.5"