A quest for the perfect birthday present leads to ever grander (and ever more imperfect) gift ideas in this clever metafiction story that's hilarious any day of the year. "I wanted to get you the greatest present ever," our narrator tells us. But somehow, none of the best ideas seemed to pan out. First, there was the pair of hand-knitted birthday socks (have you ever tried knitting birthday socks?). Then, the ten-scoop ice cream...