How to Behave So Your Children Will, Too!

by Sal Severe

Book Overview

In this eye-opening resource, Dr. Sal Severe taps his twenty-five years of experience as a school psychologist and parenting workshop leader to show that a child's behavior is often a reflection of the parent's behavior, and by making changes themselves, parents can achieve dramatic results in their children. Instead of focusing on what children do wrong, Dr. Severe teaches parents to emphasize the positive, to be consistent, and to be more patient...

• Format: Paperback
• Language: English
• ISBN: 0141001933
• ISBN13: 9780141001937
• Release Date: July 2003
• Publisher: Penguin Books
• Length: 288 Pages
• Weight: 0.59 lbs.
• Dimensions: 0.7" x 5.3" x 8.1"
• Age Range: 18 years and up
• Grade Range: Postsecondary and higher

Customer Reviews

This book has saved my life!

In all honesty before I got this book I was a depressed and irritable parent. I did not look forward to waking up in the morning and did not enjoy being a mother. I bought this book 5 days ago and I read it in 2 days. I am please to announce that I have not raised my voice or yelled at my two children (1 preschooler, 1 toddler) since I read this book! I have already started implementing the techniques that Severe talks of and they WORK. They work because my dedicated determination of following the book to the exact letter. I am determined to have a positive climate family and it is working because my tone of voice is mature and happy. When I discipline I speak in direct tone and not yelling at all. I don't get angry anymore! My kids are LISTENING and they are SHARING and they are NOT fighting! They are being sweet adorable little boys now and I have Sal Severe to thank for it. What a wonderful book! I think hospitals should give this book out when you are discharged with your first born for the first time!Simply NEEDED for EVERY family! What a difference! I LOVE BEING a MOMMY NOW! :) :) :)

A "Must Read" for new parents

I normally don't like self help books, but I purchased this after my sister-in-law recommended it to me. I was pleasently suprised to find this book offers down to earth, realistic advice. I was suprised to find out that most parents only spend 7 minutes of quality time with their children a week. Yes, a WEEK. Catch your children being good and let them know it is the message of this book. It also offers some good examples of what to do if your child is behaving in certain ways. It covers childhood from begining until the very turbulent teenage years. My son is a very active 2 1/2 year old and I have been using Mr. Severe's advice for about 2 weeks and have already seen improvement. I intend on reading this book several more times in the years to come. Thanks Sal!

A wonderful training manual for all parents!

I originally bought this book because of the problems I see my brother and sister-in-law having with my 4-year-old nephew. It was as if Dr. Severe was a guest in their home for a few hours and wrote this book specifically for them! Uncanny! Luckily, my sister-in-law has purchased a copy of it and is actually reading it!But I also found the book VERY helpful for myself and my husband...and we're not even parents yet! Reading Dr. Severe's theory of discipline as a way to teach good decision making gave me a sense of confidence...that by preparing for misbehavior before it even happens, I'll be better equipped to handle it when it does. Most of all, it provided an opportunity for my husband and I to really talk about how we want to handle our children (and ourselves!) in the future...luckily, we are on the same page. The book brought to the forefront not only how absolutely NECESSARY it is for parents to be consistent WITH their children, but how vitally important it is for parents to be consistent BETWEEN themselves. Divide and conquer seems to be a running theme with children (at least it is with my nephew). Now we know that working together will only make things easier...for all of us.

Best Family Book-EVER! This Book Should COME w/ the Child!

This book is very practical for the "every day" parent. Not only does the child's behavior improve, but the parent's as well! (First hand experience speaking here!)First and foremost, this book is written at the average parent level of understanding. Second, after reading just the author's forward, instead of feeling like you've got to change because you're such a BAD parent, you feel FREEDOM to become a BETTER PARENT! Third, the ideas in the book are GREAT and you come away with an understanding that you should keep doing the things you are already doing that work well, but have easy-to-use tips to tweek your parenting skills into getting better behavior out of your child and yourself. In the final analysis, our family life was positively enriched by this book, even if all it did was to help we, the parents, understand the motivations of our children to PUSH OUR BUTTONS!We've already bought two more copies as new baby gifts for relatives!

I highly recommend it to parents

What makes this book, among hundreds of parenting advice books, different? It engages parents in a serious look at how profoundly their actions, and reactions, influence their children's trust and cooperation, while giving them a 101 course in behavior management.Based upon stories from thousands of parents, Dr. Severe has devised strategies for parents to manage their behavior, while successfully guiding their children's behavior. He uses common behavior scenarios to exemplify ways in which parents can use these strategies. Familiar occurrences of tantrums in the grocery store, bedtime hassles, or fighting siblings, often leave parents feeling angry, helpless, defeated, and without control. Dr. Severe pin-points consistency as a key element in successfully deterring misbehavior and promoting good behavior. As a parent, I know how difficult it is to remain consistent. A statement he made in the book sums up what many parents experience. "Some days we let misbehaviors slide, some days we play warden." I found myself nodding with recognition as he described how parents often feel too tired to argue or yell in a desperate effort to gain cooperation from their children. It's easy for parents to become caught up in a cycle of power struggles and inconsistent discipline. In his book, Dr. Severe helps parents break these cycles and gain control, with simple self-assessment methods and practical ideas for: implementing incentives without bribing utilizing punishments that teach, and managing children's behavior without arguments andpower struggles. He also discusses the difference between threats and warnings, the ineffectiveness of spontaneous spanking, and how to make time-outs productive. He stresses the importance of acknowledging our children's good behavior, and gives us dialog that will help them develop valuable decision-making skills. I found this empowering collection of stories and activities easy to read, non-judgemental, and I highly recommend it to parents who want to improve their parenting skills. Dr. Severe also shares tips and insights in a free one year subscription to his quarterly newsletter for purchasers of his book.