Grand Theft Jesus: The Hijacking of Religion in America

by Robert S. McElvaine

Book Overview

"Jesus never wrote a book, but I recognize his handwriting in Grand Theft Jesus . Like Jesus, McElvaine uses lively illustrations and a serious sense of humor to cleanse the temple of exclusive and exploitative religion." The Reverend Alan Storey,Calvary Methodist Church, South Africa "We're mad as Heaven, and we're not going to take it anymore!" declares historian Robert McElvaine in this passionate and often hilarious rallying cry for sincere Jesus...

• Format: Hardcover
• Language: English
• ISBN: 0307395782
• ISBN13: 9780307395788
• Release Date: March 2008
• Publisher: Crown Publishing Group (NY)
• Length: 322 Pages
• Weight: 0.65 lbs.
• Dimensions: 1.2" x 6.5" x 9.4"

Customer Reviews

Christianity Terminators: Jesus as Prince of War

"Why do you call me 'Lord, Lord', yet do not do what I tell you?" That's in the Gospel by Luke, I think. Having been introduced into the murky waters of American Christian Fascism by author Chris Hedges, Grand Theft Jesus immediately appealed to this reader. In an erudite, yet so easy to read and often hilarious way, in a book that seems purposefully written to reach and positively influence as huge a public as it possibly can reach (even a woman translator in Mexico), Robert McElvaine creates in his readers the immediate and cristal-clear sensation that they are no Christian anymore because they do not follow what is the core of Christianism; that they are permitting, enabling in fact, the (anti)Christian activities, officially protected by the George W. Bush-created "Office for the protection of the Faith", which serve as (im)moral justifications for those who spread this fake religion, to do all they want to do, permit them to foist any outrage on other people who, if we are to literally belief gospels and what Jesus' teaches in them, are our neighbors (yes, even if they live in the Middle East, even if they're gay, even if they're women who have had to abort), and they do this foisting by waging, not defensive, not pre-emptive, not even preventive wars, but "wars of choice", a fine term to define what the Bush administration has been doing. In the end, Grand Theft Jesus talks of the bid for disposition of Jesus' true acts and teachings unto the garbage can of history. As a once-Catholic who seeks the Truth, one is tempted to call an angst-filled request: "Can We Start Again Please?" Ultimately, what do Fake Christians have to fear? They -scholars of Fascist anti-Christianity like the late Falwell, James Dobson, Reid, Robertson -who's got his own version of the 6th Commandment- and other vultures whose prowesses are, if not revealed, certainly exposed for what they are in this book- I was saying, They "know" and they boast, that, believing that Jesus is their Savior they are saved, and they are! saved in this world to justify more visitation of mysery on the poor and world's disinherited, scandalous tax rebates for the mega-rich, whose influence and funds account for their mega-churches. For them Religion is Bread & Circus with which to make even the decent U.S. citizens remain in a slumber, and successfully stop them to consider what the U.S. Empire has done to the whole world, how the U.S. Empire's "aid" to countries in dire straits is more often than not only a meager reparation for the irreparable harm that the "Christian" officials who protect them and have been protected and justified by them for decades, have imposed on countries like Guatemala, Honduras, Chile, Nicaragua, which at present is a failed state, not having been able to stand up since Reagan & Bush Sr. & Kissinger turned her into a barren territory. Now maybe these Christian-Lites are blessing the militarization of Mexico and the effective occupation of what used to be

Grand Theft American Christianity: A Damning Indictment from An Evangelical Protestant Historian

Drawing amply upon Scripture, Robert S. McElvaine, an Evangelical Protestant Christian historian at Millsaps College, offers a damning indictment of contemporary Fundamentalist Protestant Christianity in "Grand Theft Jesus". He mocks so-called American "Christians" who stress biblical inerrancy, as long as that doesn't include faithfully adhering to Christ's teachings. Instead, he refers to them as "Constantinians" and "Xians", claiming they've forsaken completely Christ's teachings by adhering to a faith which he describes, with ample sarcasm, as "ChristianityLite". Indeed, he compares the state of religious affairs in the United States with what Christ found in the Temple in Jerusalem, arguing persuasively that "leaders" such as Pat Robertson, Jerry Falwell, and others of their ilk owe more in common with the very priests which Christ criticized, than with Jesus Christ himself. McElvaine contends that true Christians should follow Christ's teachings, which include doing "good works". He insists that merely professing one's faith in Christ isn't sufficient in becoming a true Christ follower. He also offers harsh criticism against the "prophets" of megachurches who advocate a "feel good" version of Christanity, as well as those "preachers" whose version of Christanity would condone every unethical act imaginable, as long as those committing these acts continued "to accept" Christ as their personal savior. His book is nothing less but a persuasive, well-written, polemic against what he recognizes is wrong about religious fervor in the United States today. McElvaine's litany of harsh, often acerbic, observations and comments covers every issue of importance to the Religious Right in recent years. For example, in the chapter entitled "Unintelligent Design", he argues persuasively as to why the Religious Right is wrong about stem cell research, Intelligent Design and other flavors of creationism, and global warming. He devotes several chapters to the ungodly influence of the Xian Religious Right on Republican Party politics, noting how it has "enslaved" the party. His condemnation includes more than a few unflattering portraits of Xian preachers like Robertson and Falwell and politicians ranging from former congressman Tom DeLay to President George W. Bush. Will this explosive polemic about much of current American Protestant Christanity satisfy the millions who have succumbed to the charismatic preachings of the Xian Right? Probably not, since many will undoubtedly remain influenced by their so-called "preachers". However, hopefully, some will be challenged by McElvaine's provocative words to try instead to adhere to Christ's teachings as recorded in the New Testament, not as they've been subverted and perverted by Xian preachers.

THANK GOD FOR GRAND THEFT JESUS

There is a Seinfeld episode where George--in an effort to improve his decision-making and his life in general--decides he will do the opposite of what he thinks he should do. Turns out to be a good decision. In reading Grand Theft Jesus I am reminded of that episode. Historian Robert McElvaine explores hundreds of avenues where modern "Christians" would be better suited to follow the example of George Costanza in the Gospel According to Seinfeld. And would be well advised to actually read the New Testament. McElvaine presents in clear and passionate prose the prosecution's case in the trials of the Religious Right in the Court of Public Opinion. By defining their Christianity as "Christianity Lite", McElvaine makes keen and simple observations that will leave the reader dumbfounded. Then mad. Then energized. Then rejuvenated. How on earth did we allow "Christianity Lite" to happen? The loudest hollering Christians and lovers of Jeeeeesus are exposed as the idol-worshipping reprobates they truly are. Grand Theft Jesus also arms the reader to counteract the "voodoo Christianity" of the "soul molesters" that dominate American media. Though his observations are keen and simple, Grand Theft Jesus is obviously the work of a man with an absolute command of world history. McElvaine exhibits a rare gift of making history and politics relevant and interesting outside the academy. His obvious passion for the subject matter coupled with his ability to weave millennia of world history into a modern discussion of religion leaves quite an impression. Grand Theft Jesus is another in a line of McElvaine's truly innovative approaches to the task of the historian. The basic argument of his previous book and masterpiece--Eve's Seed--is even presented near the end of Grand Theft Jesus, providing the reader unfamiliar with McElvaine exposure to one of the great and under-exposed minds of America. His books not only provoke thought, but stay with you for some time after you've read them. His perspectives are consistently a breath of fresh air. In Grand Theft Jesus, McElvaine will have you breathing fire. The Daily Show / Colbert Report set has needed an academic figurehead for some time. Not left, not right, just learned and reasonable. McElvaine's approach to social commentary is the opposite of Steven Colbert's, but they share the same ultimate goal. And are funny, insightful, and entertaining in the process. It is obvious from Grand Theft Jesus McElvaine could play this learned figurehead role. In U2's cover of "Helter Skelter", Bono speaks a line in introduction: "Charles Manson stole this song from the Beatles. We're stealing it back." So too Robert McElvaine with Christianity in Grand Theft Jesus.

McElvaine's Modest Proposal

Robert McElvaine has a modest proposal: he wants American Christians, especially those under the sway of the "Jesus Thieves" who most loudly claim to follow "Him," to expend far less hot air saying "Jesus" and far more energy doing Jesus. Not only does this noted historian recover a good deal of essential (and largely ignored) Christian doctrine, he sustains, even through his appendices, a satirical unmasking worthy of Jonathan Swift or Mark Twain. How deeply does the humor of Grand Theft Jesus cut? On this one, I'll have to side with McElvaine-fan George Carlin (who knows a little something about wit). But readers attracted to wordplay and repartee will find themselves repeating aloud McElvaine's puns and paradoxes, and laughingly nodding their heads at his de(con)struction of the way the "Right Reverends" of evangelical "Fun-damentalism" engage in biblical "X-a-Jesus" in order to promote the painless "miracle cure" of "ChristianityLite," and the morally bankrupt (and bankrupting) ideology it so often supports. If only 51% of Americans had read this book before going to the polls in '04. . . .