First Wives' Tool Kit: A Survival Manuel

by Carol Kreit

No Synopsis Available.

• Format: Paperback
• Language: English
• ISBN: 0970657617
• ISBN13: 9780970657619
• Release Date: August 2001
• Publisher: Advocate House
• Length: 147 Pages
• Weight: 0.46 lbs.
• Dimensions: 0.5" x 5.5" x 8.5"

Customer Reviews

Breaking free into Beauty

"I am sore wounded, but not slain. I will lay me down and bleed awhile, And then arise to fight again." ~Ancient Poem If you have lost a partner, friend or even just feel a little lost in the big bad world, this book can help you find your life's path again. Are you in a situation where you feel your life has gotten a bit out of control? Do you want to regain control of your life, finances? Are you going through a divorce, separation or have recently lost the one you love most? Carol Kreit is like a kind friend who rushes to your side with the box of tissues and a plan for making your life beautiful again. When you are in pain, perhaps the last thing you want to do is to "dust yourself off." I know I'd rather stay down there in the dust crying my eyes out. But people need us. We have gifts to give the world. We have to go on when the only thing we want to do is dissolve into the earth, away from the pain. I know this feeling. What you are going through right now is perhaps your most challenging life test. At times we women rely on our best friends to get us through the bad times with our marriage partners. At times when we lose a partner, we are losing our best friend. Where do we turn? My thought was not to review this book today, but to rather read it from cover to cover and find some answers. Then I realized how much it might mean to other women out there if I shared my thoughts on this book. The author experienced a divorce and has written the book from that perspective. She knows what it feels like to be in shock, to work with lawyers and how it felt to go home to an empty house. The beauty is that she takes this experience and gives a gift of herself to the reader. The Topics Include: Reality Check: Seeing where you have been and where you want to go. Why Do Bad Things Happen? Will I Ever Recover? What If I?m Over 50? How Can I Go Forward? How Can I get Over the Pain? Your Attitude: The tool to help you recover from pain. Why You Feel Abandoned The Road to Healing What You Were Never Taught The Self Worth/Abandonment Connection Eliminate the Negatives Do it: Tools that move you forward Don't Remain a Victim Getting Started Examine Your Beliefs Making Changes Living Alone with Style Control It: Understanding control and suggestions to give you control of your financial situation It is difficult to believe that 60% of all marriages end in divorce, but those are the statistics. It is difficult to think about throwing away things the person you loved gave you, but the authors suggests that "some cleaning" is an essential part. This helps you forget and not be reminded of the nightmare. The author also gives a list of actions you can take to make yourself feel better. How about taking some time to spoil yourself? My father always suggested to me that I should save up my own money in a secret bank account just in case my marriage didn?t last. I thought it was silly at the time, but the longer I'm married, the more

A newly- alone person's BEST FRIEND!

Author Carol Kreit provides good news and a crucial helping hand to women everywhere who suddenly find themselves alone in midlife as a result of divorce or death of a spouse. Kreit's book, First Wives' Tool Kit: A Survival Manual is a how-to-survival godsend written by a real survivor.Today, Carol Kreit is a published author, successful entrepreneur and a happily married woman. It was a long hard road for her to recovery after her first husband ended their 28-year marriage with few parting words as he sped out of her life in his Jaquar. In the aftermath, she was confused, alone and seemingly at wit's end grappling with the reality of her new life. Yet this is a success story and one from which all can learn. Carol Kreit pieced together strands of wisdom and common sense as she rebuilt her own life. Now she generously shares this wealth in a book full of practical guidance, sisterly advice and inspiring words of encouragement."I think it's important that loss of this magnitude in one's life has a ripple effect on everyone around you, including adult children," says Kreit. First Wives' Tool Kit outlines ways to accept the new reality, change basic attitudes, take action, and gain control of life both emotionally and financially. "Life is not lived in a vacuum. You must learn how to live again on your own as well as relate to your loved ones and friends on a whole new level."It is easy to understand how First Wives' Tool Kit will be a comforting supportive book for the person facing dramatic life changes. Family therapists and financial advisors will quickly see the value of this book for their clients.

Make a Difference !!

I gave this book to a friend of mine. Her mom was in a deep depression over the loss of her husband. This book literally changed her life. It gave her step by step, chapter by chapter advice that helped her pull herself together. It was remarkable to watch and I attribute her recent success to Carol Kreit. The authors 'been there and back' advise is mandatory for anyone that finds themselves in a state of helplessness. I urge you to make a difference in the life of someone you know, who may need this kind of help.

An essential tool for healing after divorce or loss

This book is billed as a survival manual, with "tools that help you get up, dust yourself off, and start over after divorce, separation or widowhood." Believe me, it delivers all that and more! Carol Kreit offers practical advice and inspiring insights without sounding preachy or Pollyanna-ish. She writes with a warm, engaging style that makes you feel like she is a friend sitting next to you, sharing her experiences. At a painful time in my life, her stories and advice gave me a sense of possibility and optimism, a belief that I could find love again, and a feeling that my life would go on with happier days ahead. The book is filled with useful information and great advice in the areas that can be the most frightening after a divorce or other loss -- everything from living alone to taking control of your finances. It is a book that's all about healing every aspect of your life. It's amazing that one book can address both the emotional side and the practical issues so effectively, but it does.As a person who went through a painful separation and divorce and had to rebuild my life from the ground up, I highly recommend this book - Carol Kreit is a lifesaver!

Get Up, Dust Yourself Off, and Then Start Over

The rating correctly indicates that I think highly of this book but I want to begin this review by expressing a concern I have about its title. Almost all of the thoughts, feelings, and experiences which Kreit shares are relevant to men as well as to women who must also struggle to overcome the trauma of a divorce, a separation, or the death of a spouse. My fear is that the title will deter men from purchasing this book and thus deprive them of the guidance and encouragement they need to overcome such a loss. I also take issue with the phrase "tool kit" which strikes me as insensitive to the severe pain which so many men as well as women suffer after divorce, separation, and widowhood. From her own personal experience shared with the reader, Kreit has learned how difficult it is to accept the reality of a new situation, to get values and attitudes in proper alignment, to move forward into an uncertain future, and eventually to gain (or regain) control of one's life. For me at least, "tool kit" is an inappropriate descriptive of what in fact Kreit provides.After a brief review of the personal experiences from which she has learned various lessons of possible value to others, Kreit organizes her material within four Parts: Reality Check ("Seeing where you are and where you want to go"), Your Attitude ("The tool to help you recover from pain"), Your Actions ("The tools to move you forward"), and Gaining Financial Control ("Ways to stay organized and in control"), followed by a Conclusion section in which she reiterates key points. Kreit understands that readers (both male and female) who have experienced a traumatic separation from a spouse vary (sometimes profoundly) in terms of values, attitudes, and circumstances prior to, during, and then following such a loss. At which point in that process does the man or woman read this book? How receptive is he or she to what Kreit recommends? How effective is she or he when attempting to take appropriate action on any/all of the recommendations? For example, a woman who has lost a husband after a prolonged illness is in a quite different situation (and has a quite different mindset) than does a woman who finds a letter on the dining room table and is shocked to learn from it that her husband has left her and plans to file for divorce. In my opinion, the book will be of greatest value to those who pretend that Kreit is a close friend who wants to be helpful, either to them or to someone else they care deeply about. "Here's what happened to me. This is what I have learned. Here are some options I think you should carefully consider." Obviously, her book is an inadequate substitute for Kreit's direct personal involvement in a given situation but at least it addresses relevant issues and offers practical suggestions. One of the book's greatest values is derived from the "Checklist" which concludes each of the four Parts. Presumably Kreit agrees with me that several of those who read this book may be in need (pe