Lofas incorporates lessons for making house rules work and shows how to establish guidelines and enforce them from the beginning. This description may be from another edition of this product.
I wish this book had more advice on the interactions between stepparents and the kids. With that said, I was very pleasantly surprised at the many great ideas she had to implement security, reliability, and traditions into the family. My man and I disagree quite a bit on the rules and disciplining of my son and this helped out work things out together before we enforced them.
Family Rules
Published by Thriftbooks.com User , 19 years ago
Family Rules is a how to do it manual for managing the stepfamily. Adults need guidance for dealing with the chaos that usually ocurrs when a stpfamily is formed. Children need the security of knowing what is expected of them. This book very much helps. I recommend this book to my clients.
Practical, realistic, and in the "Top Tier"!
Published by Thriftbooks.com User , 20 years ago
As a new stepmother, I've read close to 20 books on stepfamilies, countless books on marriage, and quite a number on parenting. (Can you tell I'm a teacher?) This is one of my favorites, largely because it diverges from the standard "psychology and philosophy" to emphasize the nitty-gritty, practical daily realities of sharing life and household space with children, particularly children who aren't biologically your own.Having taught 7th grade and become a pretty vocal fan of clear expectations and consequences, I found I agree with the vast majority of Ms. Lofas' "rules". She has a desperately-needed perspective that benevolent adults are supposed to be in charge of the family, and offers countless practical steps to accomplish things such as: dinnertime rituals, chores, bathroom habits, bedtime customs, manners, adults' bedroom privacy, showing gratitude, tone of voice in communication, not accepting excuses, etc. Much of these are exactly the issues that have come up in conversation and required some resolution in our new family. (I genuinely believe this is a helpful book even for families that don't have the added layer of complexity that stepfamilies encounter.) These guidelines are designed to ensure respect, order, and healthy boundaries within families; and to develop responsible character in children. This is one of the few books that I am campaigning loudly for my husband to please read before the children come to live with us.
A great book for todays changing families.
Published by Thriftbooks.com User , 23 years ago
I found this book to be of great help. It happens to be the first book I read on this subject. I have gained a lot of insite into the fact that I am not abonormal and that I have the same concerns as other women moving into stepparenthood. I would recommend this book for anyone who thinks they are a bad stepparent. Find out like I did that all hope is not lost. Learn how to get your house in harmony again. Gain insight on why you feel like you are fighting an up hill battle. Don't give up hope read this book!
Great guidelines and tips for stepfamily rules.
Published by Thriftbooks.com User , 25 years ago
This is an excellant book. Jeanette Lofas, a therapist and stepmother of four stepdaughters presents the reasons and need for stepfamily guidelines. She also discusses how to apply and work on family rules in an interesting and straight forward manner. If you are having problems with household rules this book will definitely shed some light on the issue for you.
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