Facing the Fire: Experiencing and Expressing Anger Appropriately

by Bill Stott and John H. Lee

Book Overview

The author of The Flying Boy describes how repressing anger can have profound effects on personal health and guides readers step by step through the process of getting past their fears. " Facing the Fire is the best book on anger I have read; it is responsible, honest, practical, and a good read. I know the techniques Lee describes work, and the exercises alone make it a valuable book. I will use Facing the Fire personally and professionally."--Dr. Patricia Love, author of The Emotional Incest Syndrome: What to Do When a Parent's Love Rules Your Life Do you believe: Anger is a "negative" emotion? "Nice" or "emotionally sophisticated" people don't get angry? Anger will disappear when you have understood intellectually what causes it? You won't be angry if you just learn to forgive? If so, you are not alone. Anger is the most misunderstood and, consequently, painful of all our emotions. But denying, suppressing, and avoiding our own and others' anger can have unfortunate results: weakened immune systems, numbing addictions, stormy relationships, lowered self-esteem. Now, John Lee, the nationally renowned speaker, teacher, and author, shows you a better way of dealing with anger. Based on his work with clients and his own experiences with anger, he: - Uses real-life scenarios to help you understand what anger is, what causes it, and why it cannot and should not be avoided - Carefully guides you through a process of confronting and getting past the fears--of losing control, of alienating people, of hurting yourself or someone you love--that keep you from honestly experiencing and accepting your anger - Gently demonstrates ways in which you can express anger constructively--from talking it out to pounding your pillow - Demonstrates why another person's anger, if it is expressed appropriately, need not be threatening or harmful to you--but in fact can help you "Anger is our most misunderstood emotion. It is a fire that will either consume or purify. In this book, through effective and practical exercises, John Lee carefully guides the reader into a healthy relationship with this powerful emotion."--Wayne Kritsberg, author of The Invisible Wound

• Format: Paperback
• Language: English
• ISBN: 0553372408
• ISBN13: 9780553372403
• Release Date: June 1993
• Publisher: Random House Publishing Group
• Length: 256 Pages
• Weight: 0.72 lbs.
• Dimensions: 0.6" x 6.0" x 8.8"

Customer Reviews

Superb if releasing anger is tough

This book is for people who have trouble with releasing their negative emotions. John Lee explains effectively the benefits from emotional release while at the same time providing some techniques for helping people with repressed anger that are simple, down-to-earth, and reasonable for people to use. This book has helped me a great deal personally, and I think it will help anyone with depression or difficulties releasing anger.

Breakthrough In Understanding Anger

.Mr. Lee's approach to discharging/expressing anger safely is RIGHT ON. Many people might think that by expressing anger - they will become more angry. In reality, you are uncovering the suppressed anger that has been inside of you all your life. You are merely becoming AWARE of it. We spend our entire lives stuffing/repressing/avoiding/medicating our anger. We will do anything but FACE it - and get it out.The good news. The amount of suppressed anger inside us is finite and can be discharged. Mr. Lee would be interested in knowing that a retired neuroscientist (Ellie Van Winkle) has discovered almost exactly the same thing about anger. Her free therapy - "Redirecting Self Therapy", teaches a unique way to safely release anger - free without a therapist. Can't provide a link here, but you can do your own search later. What Ellie's theory gives us, is a biological explanation for what John Lee expresses throughout his book.Also, John Lee has a unique theory about mental illness. Basically, he believes that trauma causes us to continually try and recreate the circumstances of original trauma, so that the mind has a 2nd opportunity to heal itself. Well, Mr. Lee, you might find the following of interest from Ellie Van Winkle:"The fantasies in which I lived for close to sixty years were unconscious attempts to recreate early traumas and provide a stage wherein I could redirect my anger toward my parents."Anger is connected to just about every mental/emotional disorder under the sun. Discharge that anger and your mind begins to heal.

Facing the Fire, by John Lee

As a therapist working with people who have anger issues, I cannot praise this book enough. This is the most definitive book about anger on the bookshelves today. Most authors try an intellectual approach to dealing with anger, but Mr. Lee goes to the heart of the problems and explains why we need it, why we avoid it, and most importantly, how to deal with it appropriately. I ask all my clients (I do group therapy with abused women who have a lot of anger) to read this book so they will have an understanding of what they and others are facing in their healing work. Also, a great book for non-professionals, because it explains anger and confronts in everyday language myths and misconceptions about anger. A must have for anyone who deals with anger (Don't we all?).