English as a Second F*cking Language: How to Swear Effectively, Explained in Detail with Numerous Examples Taken From Everyday Life

By Sterling Johnson

Book Overview

In the English language, swearing is essential to effective communication. In this hilarious and illuminating guide, you will learn just how to do it - no f*cking problem.

Whether you want to succeed in business, school, or social circles, a strong command of vocabulary is absolutely necessary. Just imagine a stranger to our shores, trying to comprehend the following conversation:

John: Mary, would you like to attend the opera this evening?
Mary: F*cking-A. should I wear my black dress?
John: Why the f*ck not?
Mary: F*cked if I know-Oh, f*ck I just remembered. It got f*cked up in the wash.
John: Well, f*ck the opera. Let's stay home and f*ck.
Mary: Good f*cking idea.

English as a Second F*cking Language (ESF*L) is the perfect way for nonnative speakers to learn the basics of swearing. At the same time, it also offers native speakers a wide variety of twists and new refinements. Page after page, ESF*L provides a smorgasbord of swearing synonyms designed to boost your vocabulary-everything from the conventional d*mn and sh*t to a host of more inventive terms that would make any truck driver blush. And when you're finished reading, our Final F*cking Exam is the perfect test of your swearing skills. You'll be surprised by how much you've learned

"Great f*cking book " --Stephen King

• Format: Paperback
• Language: English
• ISBN: 031214329X
• ISBN13: 9780312143299
• Release Date: June 1996
• Publisher: St. Martin's Griffin
• Length: 96 Pages
• Weight: 0.21 lbs.
• Dimensions: 0.3" x 4.5" x 8.0"

Customer Reviews

One of the f*cking f*nniest b**ks I h*ve ever r**d!

I first stumbled across Sterling Johnson's "English as a Second F*cking Language" summer of 2001 in a second-hand bookstore in Monterey, California. As I casually skimmed its pages, my giggles began drawing annoyed glances and assorted 'harumphs' from the other patrons, so I quickly picked up five or six copies and headed toward the cashier.To those of you fearful of lacking humorous anatomical components (aka "funny bones"), I say "Balderdash!", not to mention "Oh, c'mon!" Anyone who doesn't see the inherent silliness of assigning so much emotional baggage to f*cking WORDS for G*d's s*ke just n**ds to g*t out a b*t more.As an English teacher by trade, it's possible I suppose that I am predisposed to see the humor in it, having struggled mightily and often to explain the nuances of myriad words self-contentedly tucked away within our mother-tongue's gargantuan lexicon.But you don't have to be a TESOL-er to appreciate Johnson's sterling tongue-in-cheek mockery of academic pretense; it seeps and oozes from between every line. "English as a Second F*cking Language" is the ideal birthday, Ramadan, Chanukah, Kwanzaa, Christmas, (etc.) gift for any of your favorite speakers of English as a Second Language.Please contact me if you are still undecided about the wisdom of such a purchase. I can assure you that I have no business or personal relationship with the author, although admittedly, I should very much like to chat with this Johnson fellow, if that is indeed his [her?] real name.

Well-researched, Interesting and Hilarious

I definately recommend this comprehensive little book for people interested in real-life obscenities. It has in-depth historical and etymological info' they would never imaginge and is presented in tasteful style with wonderful examples. As the title suggests, this book is excellent for foreigners. But native speakers of English love it too.

A great book for a foreign person

If you are not a native English speaker - and want to *really* understand what these f*cking Americans are talking about - this book is a must-read

Funniest book I've read in years.

This is the funniest book I've read in years. This year I'm giving copies to all my friends with open minds (and to a few narrow-minded people who need to lighten up).I picked up some great expressions I'd never heard before and scored 100% on the final exam at the end of the book, which is a classic in itself. The dialogues are hilarious, just the thing for aspiring actors to use as practice exercises.I'd love to see the author on "Politically Incorrect." He'd fit right in. Maybe they'll make a movie of the book. After all, they made a movie about "Pi." If they ever did make the movie, Bill Murray would be perfect as Sterling Johnson.I don't know how many times I've picked this book up and read passages aloud to friends. They are always delighted, although some pretend to be shocked.It's a gem.