Divorce Busting: A Step-by-Step Approach to Making Your Marriage Loving Again

by Michele Weiner-Davis

Book Overview

In this groundbreaking book, Michele Weiner-Davis gives straightforward, effective advice on preventing divorce and how couples can stay together instead of coming apart.Using case histories to... This description may be from another edition of this product.

• Format: Paperback
• Language: English
• ISBN: 0671797255
• Release Date: February 1993
• Publisher: A Fireside Book
• Length: 256 Pages
• Weight: 0.59 lbs.
• Dimensions: 8.4" x 0.8" x 5.5"

Customer Reviews

This Book Saved My Marriage

I have been married for 16 years, 3 kids, 2 dogs, great home - what I thought was the perfect life. Almost two years ago my wife came to me and told me she wanted a divorce. She "loved me but wasn't in love with me anymore", was how she put it. She had been going to a therapist for over a year who had encouraged her to "find herself", "make herself happy". Never mind her husband and her children. I agreed to go to counseling sessions with her therapist. The counselor wanted us to explore our past and express our anger at each other. With each session our marriage got worse. I begged my wife to stay in the marriage and keep trying to make it work, not just for us, but for the children. She refused. She said it was over.I bought "Divorce Busting" after visiting the author's web site. I read that there was a name for what happened to me. It's called the "walkaway wife syndrome". I read the book from cover to cover several times during the next few months. I immediately stopped chasing and begging my wife to return. I employed every technique in the book. I even tried what Michele calls "the last resort technique". I learned that I couldn't change my wife, but I could change myself. If I changed, truly changed my behavior, it would have to change my marriage. I love how this book is so clearly written. I really enjoyed( and continue to enjoy ) setting and achieving my goals. I love how this book gave me hope. It took almost 4 months of constant work on my part, but it worked!! My wife came back. For the first month that she was back, it was touch and go. I continued to use my divorce busting techniques and mindset, and now things are better than they have ever been in our marriage. We're like newlyweds again.If you need to save your marriage and your family, Divorce Busting is the book to buy! Should be required reading before and during marriage. Thanks Michele!Justin

Divorce Busting changed my life!

I couldn't disagree more with the woman from California. Although this book isn't everything for everybody- no book ever is- it completely changed my life. My husband was in the midst of a mid-life crisis, big time. He had an affair, lost weight, the whole bit. Everyone was telling me to leave. But I didn't want to give up seventeen years of marriage when we have 3 kids together. Call me crazy, but through the whole thing, I still knew our marriage could work. But I didn't know how to make that happen. I was so depressed. My friends were tired of talking to me. I went to a therapist who told me to leave. Nothing helped.Then I saw Divorce Busting in the bookstore. When I read it, it felt like the author had been watching my marriage from my living room. I learned so much from it, not only about getting my husband back, but about all kinds of relationships. The methods WORK! My husband and I have never been happier. I don't usually write reviews, but I just couldn't keep quiet when I read the review from that unhappy woman. I realize that some people can't save their marriages because it's too late. But even if I had not been able to turn things around in my marriage, I feel I am a better, stronger person because of this book. I have the author to thank for saving my marriage!

This book saved my best friend's marriage

I saw the author on the Oprah show. My best friend's wife had already filed for a divorce and he was depressed beyond description about it. I told him to get the book. He got it, read it over and over, used what he read and she started to soften. It took 4 months of hard work on his part. He would tell me every day what technique he was using, and what progress he was making. Today, they are madly in love with each other again. She says he has become a new person. He says their relationship is like it was when they first met. They have become friends again. My wife and I have both read the book and we love the stories. We give copies of the book out at wedding showers and anniversaries. I think Divorce Busting is written in an easy to understand way. If you are married, I recommend that you(and your spouse)read this book!

#1 Most Recommended Book

I'm a marriage columnist and author of two books on marriage: Marriage 911 and Chocolate Chili Pepper Love. I'm not a professional counselor, I'm a humorist/storyteller and write as a friend to others who are hurting in their relationships. The #1 book I recommend to those "stuck" in problem areas, the book that was most helpful to me during a time of darkness and confusion in my own marriage is Divorce Busting. When couples are hurting they don't usually need a course in WHY (they are already experts at that) -- what they need is HELP and RELIEF. Michelle's warm, practical, engaging advice is the medicine this writer/speaker prescribes for those who want to improve their marriage and maintain a sense of personal peace and dignity in the process. Thank you, Michelle! Keep up the good work.

Helped save my marriage!

The book details what Solution-Oriented Brief Therapy (SBT) is about and offers step by step ways to turn failing marriages around- even if only one partner is seeking to save the marriage. The book is written in a direct, non-psycobabble language and is also entertaining. (I found myself chuckling and saying "wow" quite often). SBT is designed to work far faster than traditional therapy- as many as 10 sessions but usually 4-6 sessions with only a couple of weeks between sessions.The author wrote the book to get the information about SBT out to more people faster because SBT really works. She has received countless letters to this effect as well as having seen successes from her own practice. It is also enlightening to know that she was a "traditional" marriage counselor before shifting to SBT.Plenty of examples and "how to's" and it is designed to work fast. The author contrasts traditional therapy versus SBT and explains why SBT works and gives some good insight as to why long drawn out traditional therapy often fails- especially if one partner is not willing to reconcile.Rather than psychoanalyze why husbands or wives are a certain way, she directs the reader to examine "successes" from earlier in the marriage. She then guides the reader towards seeking positive outcomes via short-term simple goals/objectives based on those things that "worked" in the past.The book also provides insight as to how men and women interact in a marriage environment and how men and women view and react to things differently. It also provides tremendous insight as to how a husband and wife can both be "working" at making a marriage successful, yet still be heading down the road to misery and possibly even divorce.I would recommend the book to couples spanning the spectrum from newly engaged to those who have already divorced.