Come Hither: A Commonsense Guide to Kinky Sex

by Gloria G. Brame

Book Overview

How do you tell your partner that you'd like to be spanked? Where can you find a good dominatrix? If your husband like to wear your panties, does that mean he's gay? What really goes on at SM clubs?... This description may be from another edition of this product.

• Format: Paperback
• Language: English
• ISBN: 0684854627
• ISBN13: 9780684854625
• Release Date: February 2000
• Publisher: Touchstone Books
• Length: 336 Pages
• Weight: 0.70 lbs.
• Dimensions: 1.0" x 5.5" x 8.5"

Customer Reviews

Written to a SHARP Point!

Having been involved in various aspects of kink since the late 70's, I'm usually unimpressed with the crop of fad-riding how to's about the subject popping up these days. Come Hither, however, breaks through the pack and stands out remarkably as a MUST READ if you're serious about understanding the amazing possibilities that can come from exploring natural, kink-filled passions (or need a useful tool in helping a loved one understand). Rather than coming off as a stale, academic guide, Dr. Gloria Brame has witfully woven together all of the basics in an innovative form that can be easily molded to individual tastes. Her experience in the field of sexology comes through solidly in the many technical tips offered in the text, but I also found that the book provided a nice blend of pertinent anecdotes and useful opinions that gives the reader ample food for thought in drawing their own conclusions. While perhaps not groundbreaking in its content, Come Hither clearly leaps to the head of the class as a literary model in portraying kink as healthy, safe, exciting and most of all, FUN!Great info. Great ideas. Great style. I strongly recommend it to everyone regardless of experience level.

Finally, the answers to your most gnawing questions

Are you curious about kink, but too shy to ask? Then "Come Hither: A Commonsense Guide to Kinky Sex" is the answer to your prayers. Brame's warmth and humor make this an entertaining read for anyone, but her intended audience is that enormous segment of society that would never - ever! - venture into a public venue to explore their kink. (Some with secret kinky fantasies that they're afraid to tell ANYONE about.) This is a kinky sex-positive message for the uninitiated masses, (or the newly initiated who are still figuring things out) and for anyone with someone kinky in their life. (Doesn't that about cover everyone?) Not to be confused with the numerous "how-to" guides available, "Come Hither" has a distinctly (but unobtrusively) therapeutic slant, educating and making us feel good about kinky sex. For its scope and readability and potential to change lives, I rank this one right up there with the original, unabridged "The Joy of Sex."

Good Reading

Fact of the matter is a lot of the "lifestyle" books out there just concentrate on one area. I think Gloria Brame does an excellent job of incorporting many area's into one publication that is still small enough most can read it from cover to cover without getting sidetracked or bored. Many seem to have the opinion that this book is just for "newcommers" or for "vanilla's" to read so they can understand the "lifetsyle" better. I disagree. I think it is a wonderful little jewel. In my experience though, people with years of experience have forgotten what it was like to just start to learn of the lifestyle and to just begin exploring it.I'd been "in the lifestyle" for several years by the time I read this book. And it took me back to where I had been. And it helps me to see how others I interact with may feel. At the same time it can give me a better sense of the basics. The "basics" seeming to be what many of us forget when we get so set in our own way of doing things and our own opinions.It was easy to read. I didn't get bored. {which happens all to often when I do try to read something to detailed or lengthy.} It was informational. Some of the information I already knew but it didn't hurt to see it again from another perspective. Most of all it was educational from several points of view. Overall it was a good read. I recommend it quite often. It does add a bit of variety from many of the other publications oftentimes listed for learning more about the "lifestyle."

For the most part - a fun common sense sane book on d/s

I've finally got around to reading Come Heither - and it was a great trip. Fun and light but insightfull the author covers the basics and shares her experience about d/s in a friendly human way. This is a big plus.Part of me thinks there isn't a lot new here (Sensuous Magic and Screw the thorns are still the classics for me) what is rare is Brame's idea that if d/s players spent more time on the emotional, psychological and sensual aspects of it rather then the type of toys you use the scene would be full of much happier people. Common sense but not something I've seen a lot in the scene so far. Also her common sense explantion of what makes a good dominant, lifestyle as opposed to role play, and interacting in public are worth buying the book alone. It was very helpful to me in those aspects.A side note. I started to understand d/s better once I read a few vanilla relationship books. A Mistress is still a human being despite all the melodrama. We need more "human" books out there like this one. bravo! (HieroV@aol.com)

Please, Mistress, May I Have Another?

When beer companies and fashion designers begin basing advertising campaigns on high-gloss photographs of men licking the feet of models wearing black stilettos, you know pop culture has truly become obsessed with all things leather and kinky. It's a far cry from 1993 when Dr. Gloria Brame was the lead writer of "Different Loving," the ground-breaking book on sexual dominance and submission. The book was so controversial it almost didn't get published; it's now considered the Bible of the BDSM movement and one of the driving forces behind kink going mainstream."Come Hither" is Brame's long-waited follow-up, a perfect companion to that first book. If "Different Loving" was a scholarly and detached overview of an exciting and unexplored new world, then "Come Hither" is like finding a chatty and knowledgeable tour guide who knows all the best spots in town.This is a book for both the curious and the experienced. Fearful of sharing your fantasies of being tied up to your partner? "Come Hither" offers clear and smart advice. Wondering about the proper use of a Butterfly Board or a Neuro-Wheel? "Come Hither" has detailed descriptions of dozens of kinky toys and devices.Brame not only is one of the world's foremost experts on BDSM, she's also an engaging writer who is able to convey her passion and knowledge in a conversational style. She never takes herself, or her topic, too seriously. So much of society's perception of BDSM is cloaked in danger and darkness. Brame shows the human side: the intimacy and the warmth and the humor. "Will heavy makeup make me look cheap?" she asks in a chapter delving into cross-dressing. "Of course," she replies, with a wink and a nod. "Isn't that the fun part of it?"You'll find a lot of those kinds of moments in "Come Hither." You'll also find solid and fascinating information and tips by the woman who, literally, wrote "the book" on BDSM.