Beyond Betrayal: Taking Charge of Your Life After Boyhood Sexual Abuse

by Richard B. Gartner

Book Overview

With compassion and clarity, Richard Gartner shares insights from years of working with male survivors. Among this book's greatest strengths is the extensive use of examples from Dr. Gartner's clinical practice to illustrate problems and solutions on the path to healing. Beyond Betrayal offers support, encouragement, and useful skills to men in recovery.
--Mike Lew, M.Ed., author of Victims No Longer and Leaping upon the Mountains

"If you...

• Format: Hardcover
• Language: English
• ISBN: 0471619108
• ISBN13: 9780471619109
• Release Date: April 2005
• Publisher: Trade Paper Press
• Length: 256 Pages
• Weight: 1.15 lbs.
• Dimensions: 1.0" x 6.4" x 9.1"

Customer Reviews

If there's one book that can help you, it's this one!

Richard Gartner's book, his words, his depth of understanding, his ability to connect with the reader in a safe and compassionate and empowering way, is stunning. It has been like holding up a mirror to our life, to the nuances and difficulties in our marriage, to the rage and shame that my husband has lived with for decades. He has never been able to read a book on this topic until this one - Gartner speaks as though he's speaking directly to the reader. It feels as though he's written this just for you. Read this book if you are a male survivor of sexual abuse - and read it if you are a spouse or partner too. As a spouse trying to understand the complexities of these issues, this book is a life saver. I cannot recommend it highly enough. If you want one single book on this topic, choose this one. I have several others that can't even come close to the precision and insight and simplicity and understanding that exist in these pages. Thank you Richard Gartner for this gift.

Life Changing

This book was the first one I read when I finally chose to accept my abuse. It is sensitive, compassionate, and full of positivity. Some of the stories from other surviviors will force you to recall similarities in your life, but in the end, it will help you to appreciate that you're not alone and you will become a Survivor of Childhood Sexual Abuse and no longer a Victim. Mr. Gartner will give you the tools that you need to move forward and live a life that you always knew you could live. It will not happen over night or over a month or even a year, but it will happen!!

What do YOU do now?

In the early months of therapy my therapist suggested this book. She had listened to me when I said that the other books seemed to be about victims, but not 'of' victims; she said this book was geared more from the victims' perspective. Reading it was one of the defining moments in my healing; this was a turning point. I read about people just like me; I read about how they felt and how they expressed it to Dr Gartner; I read about them not wanting to say the truth because they feared reprisal or ridicule; I read about things I thought only I felt, suffered, endured and held inside. I read reality and it hit home, it hit home hard and true and I let go of something. I let go of the illusion that I was the only one in the whole world that felt like that. I let go - so simple yet so profound, and in letting go I opened a small window to let my therapist see into my world. If you doubt anyone ever enduring the same as you, read this book. Skim it if you will; jump about through the paragraphs; read one page a day if it hurts but, please, read it. Read the real people. Know, in you heart, that you are truly not alone. You have to do that for 'you' now.

Great Book

It is the best book I read on boyhood sexual abuse. It is a life saver!!! It is very constructive in rebuilding one's life after the abuse. A must read...

TEN STARS OUT OF FIVE

I would rate this book 10 stars out of 5 - that's how great it is. It is different from a lot of books on the subject. The author writes with extreme clarity and leads the reader through some different subjects than other books do. It is positive with good constructive advice in all areas where male victims are confused, afraid, and angry over. He is very understanding towards the male way of thinking and doing, but is not overly sympathetic either. His caring shines through. He is understanding and approaches the subject matter of fact. This is a must read for men who are brave enough to face the truth and who want to heal. The over all theme is healing in this book. He doesn't give step by step instructions or magic ways to make it happen. He's honest when he says it will take a lot of hard work. The scars don't go away, but we do learn the skills to deal with it and live a "normal" life. I can keep writing about this great book. It has helped me greatly and has give me new hope and to pull out strength. It has given me a more defined direction in my therapy. I love this book and was very disappointed when I found I had finished it. I hope this author writes more on this subject. It is needed. I hope this review helped someone out there. Good Luck!