Agnes and the Hitman

by Jennifer Crusie and Bob Mayer

Book Overview

Agnes Crandall's problems are rolling to a boil. First, a dog-napper invades her kitchen, seriously hampering her attempts to put on a wedding that she's staked her entire net worth on. Then a man climbs through her bedroom window to save her. "Shane" (no last name) may be Agnes's hero, but he's also a professional hitman--so he's no stranger to trouble himself... Between a rival who wants to take him out and an uncle who may have lost five million...

• Format: Mass Market Paperback
• Language: English
• ISBN: 0312363052
• ISBN13: 9780312363055
• Release Date: August 2008
• Publisher: St. Martin's Press
• Length: 419 Pages
• Weight: 0.46 lbs.
• Dimensions: 1.1" x 4.3" x 6.6"

Customer Reviews

book reader

really good, love the characters , nice dark humor, easy to read, Agnes is a character you just cant help but love. a nice weekend read.

Totally awesome!

Unbelievably quirky but believable characters, great plot, great secondary characters and wonderful narrative style. And HUMOR!!!! Read it several times before passing it along to my daughter. Now I want it back!

If at first you don't succeed.....

Authors Jennifer Crusie and Bob Mayer first collaborated on "Don't Look Down" in 2006. Crusie's crazy-endearing heroines and Mayer's rough and tumble Green Beret adventures didn't mix very well with Crusie's fans, and the novel was not as well received as her earlier efforts. I'd been unhappy with Crusie's "Bet Me" from 2005, and was worried I wouldn't see her back in top form. The improbable, "Agnes and the Hitman" has changed my opinion greatly. The story of one independent, audacious (and above all, CRANKY) female chef in the south who writes a daily column but spends most of her time disentangling crazy situations, was a resounding hit with me! Agnes Crandall's mixed up with some crazy Italians who bring the mob concept to South Carolina. One of Agnes' best childhood friends, Lisa Livia, sides with Agnes in a dispute with Lisa's mother, the widow Brenda Fortunato. But is Brenda just trying to renege on her deal to see Agnes the house, or is there something more evil afoot in the fact that Agnes has to fend off numerous attempts on her life with a cast iron frying pan? Enter Shane, a supposed hitman who is sent to protect Agnes by her friend ( a consigliere-type fellow) and his uncle, Joey. The details of Shane's mysterious past and his prowess with a gun were donated by Mayer....the romance and some enthusiatic bedroom scenes between Shane and Agnes are all Crusie, returning to form. The chaotic mix of dead bodies, missing money, wedding shenanigans and southern charm are a mix of both their styles. Unlike their former effort, Crusie and Mayer have written, for their second effort, a book you can't put down; a madcap whodunnit. The authors begin every chapter with an exerpt from Agnes' column, "Cranky Agnes"....here's my favorite: "Many of us have a recipe passed down to us by our mothers that pretty much sums up our childhood memories in an ingredient list. In my case, it was 'One chilled glass, two parts Tanqueray, wave at the vermouth bottle, stir clockwise if you're north of the equator, and for God's sake, Agnes, don't bruise the gin!'" "Agnes and the Hitman" has those little laughs scattered throughout a fine comedy romp. Bravo Crusie and Mayer....keep them coming! Highly recommended!

Highly entertaining

"Agnes and the Hitman" by Jennifer Crusie and Bob Mayer reads like a Southern novel with a hint of The Sopranos. Agnes, a columnist for a paper in South Carolina just recently bought a house from her best friend's mother aka ex-mob wife, Brenda Fortunato. An intruder came into her house wanting to kidnap her dog but was instead killed by Agnes with her frying pan. With her ex-mob friend, Joey's help, Shane, a hitman and Joey's nephew, was "assigned" to guard Agnes. Thrown in to this confusing mess was that Agnes needed to throw a wedding for Brenda's granddaughter which didn't look like it will happen anytime soon. This was such a fun and hilarious novel which has many great secondary characters. It was a little confusing at the beginning to keep track of the characters and their histories but once you get the hang of it, this was such a wonderful read. Overall, the plot was interesting and the characters were likeable. It would be nice if there will be sequel for "Agnes and the Hitman." Highly recommended.

Frying Pans and Meat Forks...

After reading Jennifer Crusie and Bob Mayer's first collaboration, Don't Look Down, I fell under this writing team's spell and thought I was in book heaven. Then just a few pages into this book, I knew Agnes was going to surpass that. Agnes has a food related newspaper column and has had recent success with a cookbook called Mob Food. She has just purchased, with her fiancé Taylor, the home she has loved since childhood from a woman she thinks of as a Mother. She and Taylor are collaborating on another cookbook and a catering business while she is planning a wedding in their home for her Goddaughter. Everything sounds busy but perfect right? Wrong. In one night Agnes's life is turned upside down, enter Shane the hitman. To say anything more about the plot would spoil so many of the off the wall and entertaining happenings. Agnes and the rest of the characters are truly unique, a little demented and completely unforgettable! Mr. Mayer and Ms. Crusie make a magnificent writing duo. Their writing is witty, hilarious, adventurous and virtually flawless. In their previous book I could kind of tell (at least I like to think so) from page to page who wrote what; in this book their styles blended so well that while reading I forgot that two people wrote this story. I was so into this book I seriously contemplated calling into work so I could finish it; unfortunately my need of money won out. I can't wait to see what these two come up with next! Enjoy!!

SPICY, FUNNY, ROMANTIC TALE

She's known as food writer Cranky Agnes. Actually that's really a pretty fair description of heroine Agnes Crandall at and away from her typewriter. "Fair description" may be an inaccuracy because authors Cruise and Mayer can come up with the most outre portraits of the characters they create, all of which makes for fun, fast-paced reading. This is to say nothing of their plots that twist and turn entertaining readers with a spicy, amusing, romantic tale. Agnes would very much like to have a children, so thinking maybe third times a charm, she's on fiancé no. 3. The pair have just bought a house from a mobster's widow, Brenda Fortunat0 who offers them three months payments in return for having a family wedding in the house (and what a group that is!). Nonetheless while Agnes is planning the wedding, a dognapper appears on the scene trying to snatch Agnes's dog. Why? Because the canine was wearing an eye popping necklace in a newspaper photograph. Agnes, of course, believes the jewels are paste or worse. Then, her bedroom window is put to good use when Shane climbs in. He's there to protect Agnes, and couldn't be happieir about the assignment after he sees her. (The feeling is mutual). Missing money, a dead body, a conniving Brenda, Fortunato relatives, and hitmen all combine to make Agnes's life not only iffy but a mess. Voice performer Sandra Burr brings this comedic collection of characters to vibrant life. She's a gifted actress and director who not only grabs listeners but holds them captive until we hear the last line. - Gail Cooke

Wacky good fun

I enjoyed this book. First, this book is worth buying for the cool cover alone. The cover art gods have smiled on Jenny Crusie and Bob Mayer. This is kitchy and perfectly sells the wonderful story inside. I liked our plucky heroine. Partly because I can identify with cranky Agnes. But I partly couldn't. So when she has a fit of self realization during a moment of crankiness, it did a lot to endear her to me. She became feisty rather than mean. A lot of Crusie heroines are very, "I'll take care of everything, just get out of my way." Agnes is capable and driven, but she accepts help and lets other people fix their own problems sometimes too. She doesn't always think she has the right answer and talks things over with her friends which I found quite refreshing. Our hero I was a little sketchy on. How can you want a heroine to fall for an assassin? But about the time I was getting really nervous about Shane's place in the world, we not only learn who he works for but also that he's re-thinking his career choice for, perhaps, a desk job. And Shane's skill set holds him in good stead around Agnes's bouts of crankiness. I thought they fit together very well. They worked better together than apart, which is the best thing I can say about any couple, whether in fiction or real life. There are lots of well drawn secondary characters too - both good and evil. I like that despite being cranky, Agnes draws people to her and her food and her house, and invites them in. I felt so invited while I was reading the book at dinner (couldn't put it down) that I ordered pancakes for dessert.