Felis catus: a more inscrutable pet simply does not exist. How can we truly understand our kitties--their loves, their needs, their desire to poop on the things we hold most dear? ABCDE-F-YOU provides a full descriptive alphabet elucidating some of Fluffy's finest features, from A ("A is for ass. Your cat will lick his own vigorously and loudly at all times") to Z ("Z is for Zen, which cat ownership provides 4% of the time"). These 26...