A Dance with the Devil: A True Story of Marriage to a Psychopath

by Barbara Bentley

Book Overview

Her marriage to retired Navy admiral John Perry seemed almost too good to be true. Because it was? At the start of her relationship with the intelligent and worldly John Perry, Barbara Bentley couldn't believe her luck'so when things didn't add up, she struggled to ignore her doubts. She kept trying to put the pieces together'unaware that some of them were simply missing. Even as he drained her credit, dodged her questions, manipulated her and misled...

• Format: Paperback
• Language: English
• ISBN: 0425221180
• ISBN13: 9780425221181
• Release Date: November 2008
• Publisher: Berkley Books
• Length: 400 Pages
• Weight: 0.83 lbs.
• Dimensions: 1.1" x 5.4" x 8.1"
• Age Range: 18 years and up
• Grade Range: Postsecondary and higher

Customer Reviews

Bit of a slow read..

The book feels like it drags through the first half. What she was able to accomplish in the end was pretty amazing though.

One of the best books on psychopathy

I've studied personality disorders (socio/psychopaths in particular) as a hobby for about five years and this is one of the best books out there that I've found. I would suggest that if you want to get a good understanding of this intriguing personality disorder, this book along with Robert Hare's excellent "Without Conscience" are an excellent introduction. Before I go into the book itself, a clarification: there are both male and female psychopaths. I noticed from several other reviews that this doesn't seem to be clear to people. As for what makes this book so good, the author presents her story without revealing too much early on. This preserves the "psychopathic fiction", which is all the lies, stories, false claims, supposed achievements, etc. the psychopath tells his/her victim to win confidence. It's only until near the end of the book that the full truth is revealed, just as it was to the author. You often wonder, how could someone be so fooled by all the lies? This book does an excellent job answering the question, and may make you question what things you "simply accept" as truth in your own life. Like when that real estate agent told you "it only goes up?" Or when your 401k agent said "buy and hold?" The trick to getting people to swallow a lie without thinking is to tell them the lie they most want to hear. Like others, I had a tough time putting this one down and read it cover to cover on a flight from Arizona to New York. Like another reviewer pointed out, however, the real meat of this book is the author's experiences with the predator and the brakes get firmly applied when she delves into the minutiae of changing the laws in California. While important, I think that section of the book should have been condensed to twenty pages and included as an appendix for those interested. It just creates too huge a left turn in the narrative. Overall, definitely recommended. One of the best books I've read this year.

Fascinating - I Couldn't Put It Down!

While some readers may question the author's gullibility (and I did too, at times), I can understand it. Many women have ignored some really red flags because of love - or what they conceptualize as love (which may really be an addiction to another person). In any case, the story is very interesting, readable, and inspiring. It also has an honest quality not found in all memoirs - perhaps because some are written before the author is ready to confront certain aspects of herself. This author lays it all out, and I admire her courage.

Barbara is an Inspiration

I could not put the book down and missed my BART stop while reading a gut wrenching portion of the book! Barbara's story is amazing and shows us how we can be strong even in the most difficult times of our lives. Barbara gave a selfless act by changing the laws of Californa so that others would not have to go through what she did while trying to divorce the man who tried to kill her. I strongly encourage those who are struggling with co-dependancy issues and someone they think might be a psychopath to read this book, they are not alone.

A gripping story

Author, Barbara Bentley, gives us a firsthand look into the deceitful mind of a psychopath. She conveys the doubt and confusion of being married to and manipulated by such a person as only one who has lived it could. Ms. Bentley's determination in getting California's no-fault divorce law changed is truly inspirational. The reader can feel her confidence grow as she pursues her goal. I could not put this book down until the very last page. Alma J. Meyer Shepherdsville, KY

Heartfelt, genuinely inspiring, courageous, Barbara Bentley is an excellent writer...

Reading is not my forte, however, I could not put 'A Dance With The Devil' down. Barbara Bentley opens her world to readers, she shares her story of being married to a psychopath who drains her emotionally, financially and physically. Her dreams of a happy marriage are destroyed when her husband attempts to kill her. Barbara takes us through the ups and downs of her marriage and explains how she puts together the pieces of the puzzle that would ultimately expose her husbands lies and deceit. Barbara describes the many events she shared with her husband, John, in great detail, making this book a true page turner. In this true story, you will read how Barbara not only survived the attempt on her life, but how she courageously battled California's no-fault divorce law for victims rights. I highly recommend this book to anyone who has been in an abusive relationship, it may just save your life.